You have reached 40 and your life is plain and boring. You are the typical soccer mom and have a senior in school. The something strange happens. You are late. Not for soccer or for senior pictures, but you have just realized driving to the grocery store that you have not had your period yet and you are over a week late.
You panic, and you think oh god, now what am I going to do. You pick up a pregnancy test kit and hide it among your groceries, hoping no one notices it. You make it through checkout with out any nosey busy bodies seeing what you have purchased.
You go home, read the directions, pee in the cup and dip the stick. You wait. This is the longest three minutes you have ever had to wait. Then the timer goes off and you dread looking, but you have to. Am I pregnant, at my age? You slowly pick up the test, and peek through your fingers at it. You do a little victory dance, shout and yell “Yes!” and scare your little puppy so bad he pees on the floor and you have to clean up after him.
The little negative sign is a vivid pink, and no sign of a positive anywhere.
Then it hits you. Oh no. Am I going through menopause?
Menopause, or the change, can cause a lot of feelings in women. Some feel let down because they wont be able to have anymore babies, even though they have had their tubes tied for a long time. Others have the feeling of drying up in side. But here you can discover the different stages of menopause and what you can expect and what you can do to help yourself through this time.
Menopause is the transition in a woman’s life when three major changes take place. The production of the hormone estrogen in her body falls permanently to very low levels, the ovaries stop producing eggs, and the menstrual periods stop for good.
For most women, they are pleased to finally not have their periods anymore and welcome the change. For some women it is a depressing time and they are upset over the fact that there will be no more babies.
What woman doesn’t dread menopause and its effects on their body? Some women are lucky and don’t really have any symptoms of menopause, and breeze through it like it is a normal daily life event.
Menopause symptoms include changes in your period, hot flashes, night sweats and sleeping problems, vaginal dryness and soreness, mood swings, depression and irritability, urinary problems, lack of concentration, sex drive decreases, hair loss or thinning and abnormal bleeding or spotting.
There are four steps to going through menopause. Premature menopause is when it happens before the age of 40, the cause either natural or induced. Although women who go through it early have the same symptoms, they also tend to get weaker bones faster, raising their chances of getting osteoporosis and breaking a bone. There are different reasons that menopause can occur early, such as chromosome defects including genetics, autoimmune diseases, and bilateral oophorectomy, where there is a surgical removal of both of the ovaries, and chemotherapy or pelvic radiation therapy for cancer patients.
Women who have oophorectomy puts a woman in menopause right away. You will no longer have periods and hormones decrease rapidly, hot flashes, and diminished sexual desire. If a woman was to have a hysterectomy, but the ovaries are left in place, it will not induce menopause, because the ovaries are continuing to produce hormones. Sometimes the changes are almost not noticeable. Your periods will change, either become lighter or heavier, longer or shorter, and missing periods all together.
Perimenopause is when your body begins to move into menopause. This can last anywhere from two to eight years, and the first year after your final period. There is no way to tell how long it will last or how long it will take you to go through it. It is a natural part of aging that signals the end of your reproductive years.
There are many symptoms and people often confuse them with actual menopause itself. Here are some of the symptoms and some tips on how to get through them.
Hot flashes. Your watching tv, it is 40 degrees outside, and you are sitting there sweating and everyone else is comfortable. Try to avoid hot or spicy foods, alcohol, caffeine and stress. These can all bring on hot flashes. Watch what you are doing and what you have eaten to see what brings them on.
Vaginal dryness. You and your partner are in bed, with lots of heavy petting going on. He is ready, but you are still dry as a bone. Use a vaginal lubricant such, experiment with different types and flavors. Your doctor may also prescribe estrogen replacement creams.
Problems sleeping. You are in bed, the house is quiet and you are tossing and turning. It may not be because of your bed as some tv ads may lead you to believe. Try to get in some physical activity in each day, but not too close to bedtime. Also avoid the obvious, alcohol, caffeine, and eating huge meals too close to bedtime. Try to drink something warm, decaf tea, herb tea, and warm milk if you can, before you go to bed. Try not to take naps during the day and try to go to bed and get up at the same time each day.
Memory problems and forgetfulness. You got up from the couch and walk to the kitchen. You get there and you stand in front of the frig trying to remember what it was you were going to do. But try as you might, you don’t know what it was, and to avoid looking foolish, you busy yourself for a few minutes and return to the living room. Your husband looks at you with a questionable look. You say “What?” He asks you if you couldn’t find the magazine you were going to bring him, didn’t it still lay on the bathroom sink where he had left it? Ask your doctor about mental exercises you can do to improve your memory and again, try to get enough sleep. There are some over the counter vitamins that say they can help you with this.
Mood swings. These are probably the worst. Hopefully you have an understanding family. The worst part of mood swings is having them and having someone holding a grudge for something you said or did in the heat of the moment. But people are that way. You can let your doctor know if you have a real big problem with them, or try some of the herbal teas to see if they can help you. Also join a support group if you can for women who are going through the same thing as you, or get counseling to talk through your problems and fears.
Night sweats. You wake up, your faithful pooch is at your side and needs to be let out. You climb out of bed, open the kitchen door and let the dog out. You realize you need to go to the bathroom and stumble in there. You feel something cold and wet on your neck. You reach up and move it and realize it is your hair. It is soaked and you feel your neck. Your neck is slick with cold clammy sweat and so is your chest. It isn’t a very nice feeling and you get a washcloth and when you are done, you go back to bed to find it too is wet where you were laying and you give up and curl up on the couch with a throw and a spare pillow. Although there really isn’t much you can do about the night sweats, you can actually reduce the wet bedding by placing a towel over your pillow and over the area where you lay. Keep your bedroom at a comfortable temperature for you and don’t cover up too much, keep the blankets below your chest area. This will help not only keep you dry but keep your blankets from getting wet.
Although you haven’t gotten your period in a couple of months, that doesn’t mean that you wont get pregnant. Always keep using contraception until your doctor determines that you are indeed past menopause. Since until you reach postmenopausal, your body still produces estrogen and other hormones, and egg may still be released and you could become pregnant. Having irregular periods make it more difficult to predict the time you are ovulating.
Depression during this time is very common, due to the drop in estrogen levels. It can include anxiety, fears and mood swings. Research shows that the other symptoms you are having such as the sleep problems, night sweats, and hot flashes can cause the feelings. But you need to keep in mind that these symptoms also can have causes that are not related to menopause, so if you are having problems due to the depression and it is interfering with your life, discuss them with your doctor.
The best thing to do is to get out and do anything you want to do, as long as it is not going to be hurting anyone including yourself and others. Get involved in a group or organization, get a part time job if you are not working. Take up an exercise class, quit smoking, and do things that make you feel better about yourself such as getting a hair cut, some new clothes, and maybe take a vacation.
The loss of urinary continence. If you have problems like leaking when you laugh, cough, sneeze, or bending over, it is not uncommon. The muscles around the bladder that hold the urine inside become weaker when estrogen levels are low. Try to do some simple exercises, known as Kegal exercises to strengthen these muscles. To perform a Kegal, contract the pelvic muscles as if you are trying to tighten or close the vaginal opening. Hold for a count of three and then relax. Wait a couple of seconds and repeat. Try for a total of fifty a day, this will help improve bladder control and may even increase your sexual pleasure. Estrogen therapy may also help with the strength of the pelvic muscles.
If you are experiencing weight gain, don’t be surprised. Even though you have changed nothing in your life style, you may gain weight, have other health issues such as diabetes, and your cholesterol levels may also raise. Be sure to keep these checked regularly. To help with weight gain, you need to understand that your metabolism slows down in the mid thirties. It does this slowly, so you may not even notice it until you have gained enough weight to make things uncomfortable. Be sure to have a sensible diet and get out and walk. Walking early in the morning helps you increase your metabolism. Also check with your doctor. He may be able to help you with other ways to help you control your weight without being miserable.
Menopause is the actual time when your body is going through these changes and the time when you have not had your period for 12 months, and there are no other reasons for this to have occurred. Your doctor can determine if you have actually entered this phase of your life.
Post menopause refers to a time in a women’s life after the menopause has happened and there are no more changes that will be occurring. It is generally believed that this phase begins when a full 12 months have passed since the last menstrual period has stopped, and all body changes have occurred. From this point on, you will be in postmenopausal for the rest of your life.
Other things occurring in your life at the time you are going through menopause may make it more difficult. In this time of your life, your kids are growing up and may be leaving for college, getting married and moving away. Your parents may become ill or pass away. This all leads to more disruption in your life. Keeping disruptions down is not easy, as they are a part of life. Try to keep everything in order, keep yourself busy, and help in as much as you can in the lives of your family.
Even though you may feel that this is a devastating time for you, try to keep in mind that it is a normal life happening and take advantage of all the changes that you will go through. Look at some of the websites there are out there about menopause and read about it, you will better understand what is going on in your body, and it will help you to cope with everything you will be going through. Keep in touch with your friends and join some groups and enjoy life.
