In 2004, I was a mother of four rambunctious children, a wife, and worked full-time. My life had not been in a good place when I became pregnant in 2001 with my fourth child and I knew that four was more than enough, so I elected to have a tubal ligation to permanently prevent the possibility of conceiving again. Little did I know, however, that God had different plans for me.
My husband Brian and I had married when my fourth child, Lizzie, was four months old. Though Brian is not the biological father of my children, he loved them as his own and willingly accepted the fact that our family was complete. Yet, there was always the occasional joke about he would still get me pregnant again. I blew it off as a display of testosterone.
Twelve days before Lizzie’s third birthday though, I got a sinking feeling. I could not help but notice that I had been going to bathroom quite frequently and I had not been feeling too well. Something just did not seem right with my body. I panicked, thinking of all the horrible things that could be wrong with me. I noticed that my period was a little late, leading me to think I had uterine cancer or something of that nature. While I “knew” I could not be pregnant, I still went to the drug store to buy a test. Why make the doctor waste his time giving me a pregnancy test when he should be running tests to determine the cause of this mysterious illness?
No sooner than I looked at that pregnancy test, the two lines were already clearly visible. “That can’t be right,” I thought to myself. The doctor had told me during the procedure that only 1.6 percent of tubal ligations fail. While I have had some extremely odd and crazy experiences in my life, there was no way I was pregnant.
I woke Brian up shoving the test in his face, with a blank and jaw-dropped stare. He immediately jumped up with the biggest smile I have ever seen on his face. All he could was, “I told you so!” Despite his bouncing all over the house, boasting of his ability to impregnate me, I still refused to accept what was happening to me. I cannot get pregnant. My family is complete. I did not want any more children.
Not knowing what else to do, I called my doctor. I was told to come into the office to take another test. As I anxiously waited in the lobby with my beaming husband, the doctor called me back. When I walked around the corner, all I could see was the grin on his face and he pointed down to the paper in his hand. In big red letters at the bottom of the page, it said, “POSITIVE.” I was pregnant and I was really going to have another child.
Honestly, I was not devastated to be pregnant again, but the idea definitely took some getting used to. Lizzie had recently been diagnosed as having ADHD and she was more than a handful to care for. Then, add on the responsibility of the other children, work, taking care of house, and pursuing my college degree. I did not know how I was going to handle all of this extra responsibility. Nevertheless, as the days wore on and my belly grew, I knew that somehow it would all work out.
Since I had two previous c-sections, this baby was scheduled to be born on September 23, 2005, two weeks before my actual due date. Two months earlier, we had an ultrasound done that revealed our precious gift from God was a son. That revelation was the greatest thing my oldest son had ever heard since he was growing weary of his three sisters.
Draven Zander was born as planned and was healthy as could be. Since the doctor already had me open, I had him investigate the cause for the failed tubal ligation. The doctor was astonished to find that one of my fallopian tubes had grown back together, a vary rare occurrence. Despite the doctor’s offer to separate them again, I refused. I believe that every thing in life happens for a reason, and this was my sign that I had interfered with God’s plans. Besides, how could I ever trust that as a form of birth control again?
So, these days, when I hear someone talk about getting a tubal ligation, I smile and think about my miraculous son. Draven lights up our lives with his beautiful brown eyes, mischievous smile, and hilarious laugh. He is almost two now and we treasure every moment, knowing that his existence is a true gift from God.
