A law passed in California, which requires parents to attend mandatory parenting classes, simply misses the mark. It seems that as a parent and a social change advocate, I would be standing up and bowing to California for their seemingly forward thinking. Unfortunately, California is completely bass ackwards! Under the current law, parents of convicted gang children are required to attend mandatory parenting classes. The trouble here is the foundation and lessons of the classes.
According to Innersantum and The Washington Post, these classes are designed to teach parents how to identify gang activity and signs of membership in their children; further, the 10 to 12 week program teaches parents how to communicate with their children and find healthy alternatives to the gang lifestyle. The trouble with these classes is that, they do not account for the number one reason that children join gangs to begin with. Rob White researched the issue of gang participation, and concluded that the number one reason children join gangs, is to feel accepted, supported and welcomed into a family. Thus, parenting classes ought to follow a design which teaches parents, how to actually parent.
Parents need classes that help them understand the value of an education. They need to be shown that, without an education, they will continue being stuck in dead-in, low wage jobs that force them to stay long hours away from their children. Parents need programs that explain when a parent spends 12 hours a day away from their home and children, they have little to no control over what their children are really getting into- or who is influencing them-; regardless to the reason that you are away. We need classes that teach parents how to be advocates for their children and to be actively involved in their lives. These classes, which do not focus on identifying gang behaviors, alone, would actually teach parents the same skill with so many other important skills attached.
Let’s face it; this program seems destined to fail. The logic, for which the program rests, seems completely flawed. After all, a number one reason that parents give for their lack of involvement in their children’s lives is the need to work. Likewise, two number one reasons that children give for joining gangs is the lack of basic needs being met and a longing for belonging and support. So, explain to me how a program, which takes the parent away from their children, again, and their job- which can often times, barely support basic needs; will help the situation? It could just be me, but this idea is pretty farfetched and well, stupid.
I want more to be done. I need a difference to be made. However, this is not the way to get that difference. Parents, educators, law enforcement officials and policy makers should revisit this issue to get down to its core. Parents need help, from day one. They need a mentality overhaul. Our children, most importantly, need parents, to show them the ways of the world!
