When my pre-teenage daughter needed a dress for a school event, I never thought it would turn into such an ordeal.
I was prepared to battle whatever her choice of style was, amply equipped to battle every argument she might make for what would look “cool” or what would make her look “popular”. What I wasn’t prepared for was the fact that she wasn’t the only one I would have to battle. Seconds after entering the third store, I realized that my war would not be against my 12-year-old daughter, but instead against the clothing industry.
The racks in all of the major department stores were filled with one of two types of clothing. There was A.) the trashy garish looking clothes that seemed as if they would be more appropriate on any random street corner than on the body of my adolescent daughter. And there was B.) the overly girlish looking outfits that would only be appropriate if she were standing inside of a jewelry box spinning with her hands poised over her head.
As a mother, I was left in total shock. How was I supposed to dress my daughter in something “appropriate” when there was nothing of the sort to choose from? How was I supposed to let her express her style and individuality without allowing her to look like she was preparing to walk onto the set of a music video? How did the clothing industry expect me to fall for such obvious right or left decisions, without giving me any middle ground to fall on?
Being a parent is never filled with easy choices, we are constantly trying to make decisions which will impact the lives of our children for the better. So why is it that we can’t get just a little bit of help from those that are in control of the fashions that fill the racks of the department stores?
In doing just a quick Google search, I found more than a dozen articles more than willing to tell me how to combat the arguments of my child. More than a dozen separate experts telling me that it was in appropriate to dress my child as if she were 20 instead of 12. Here’s a hint for the experts: I know this. I would even go so far as to say that most parents know this. The problem we face is not battling our young children; it’s not having an alternative to offer them.
When we take them out shopping, whether that is for an outfit just to wear to school or something nicer for a special occasion, we expect that they be given the option to choose something that doesn’t expose their stomachs or fall off of their rear ends. Perhaps if the industry leaders would give these choices to our children, we might be surprised to find that they might make them.
The choice of what our children wear doesn’t lie in the hands of the parent, it rests solely in the hands of the department store buyer that is trying to fill the racks with the trendiest clothing available in hopes that it will drive up profits. Regardless, our children end up being the victims.
In a recent survey conducted by Tween Brands, which runs the Justice and Limited Too clothing chains for pre-teen girls, 40% of the girls responded that they set their own fashion style. This number is starting to pull away from past generations which relied more heavily on celebrities to help set the trends. So, what does this mean? Simply, it means that if a growing number of “tweeners” are admittedly setting their own style, they are doing it with the clothing that is available in the clothing outlets. So if we aren’t happy with the way our children are dressing, then we need to change the options they have available.
