Recently, I was with an elderly woman and we were leaving a meeting in a bad part of town at night. To make this more dramatic, I’m from Florida, as featured frequently on “Worlds Dumbest Criminals” and pretty much every other news network. As we were two relatively defenseless woman, I was a little worried about our safety. Evelyn*, an 82-year-old former resident of Miami’s notorious Liberty City, gave me a reassuring pat on the arm.
“Not to worry,” she said as she reached in her purse. “I have Wasp Spray.”
At first I thought she was confused. Maybe she thought we we’re being chased by an angry herd of honey bees. She soon set me straight.
“Shoots in a stream, that way I don’t get sprayed when I shoot the [expletive].”
At first I thought she was crazy. Then I realized she had a point.
I spent some time in the military. One of the boot camp basics is the dreaded gas chamber. You get a hefty dose of pepper spray or gas and it’s off to the obstacle course. It’s painful. Your nose runs, your eyes stream. It’s near debilitating.
One problem we had was that pepper spray is just that, a spray. It shoots in a cloud. If a bad wind hit, or you were standing too close to the person you were trying to spray, you got hit with it too.
Aggressive Grandma Ethyl had solved a common problem with a simple solution. Wasp Spray. It shoots in a stream. Because of that, it can shoot straighter and further than Mace and there’s no danger that the person defending themselves will accidentally spray themselves.
I decided to look into it a little more. As with any idea, opinions on it vary. The chemicals are not tested on humans and it’s not known if there are any long term consequences. In addition, it is not as immediately disabling as mace or pepper spray.
However, the answer appears to be right on the can. “It is a violation of federal law to use this product in a manner inconsistent with its labeling.” Legally, you can kill bees with it. Under standard self defense laws, you may be able to use it if its all that is available. Maybe you were attacked while beekeeping, though I don’t imagine crime rates are very high in honeycombs. One things is spelled out pretty clearly; you can’t carry it around with the intention of shooting people with it.
All facts considered, I decided to ditch the idea of switching over to Wasp Spray. I wasn’t worried about the legality of it. I live in Florida. Anything goes here. I’m pretty sure I’m allowed to force someone to drink a gallon of wasp spray while kicking them repeatedly as long as I have ‘reasonable belief of a threat.’ Go Stand-your-ground!
No, I decided against it because its just too untried. When in a self defense situation, its best to be equipped with something you know and understand how to use. There are better tried and true personal defense methods out there. Its not a matter of picking something trendy. It’s a matter of picking something you’ll be comfortable using in a life or death situation.
As a Floridian, I’ll stick to my extensive gun collection.
