Most children are drawn to puppies. They are so precious, tame, and accept lots of love. Even the most adorable of puppies can send kids on the run when it is overly playful or aggressive. Kids are also often afraid of large dogs, which may be gentle, but are intimidating just because of their size. Then, there are vicious dogs which strike a chord of fear in us all.
Overcoming the fear of dogs
Dogs can add so much meaning and joy to family life; it would really be a shame to allow your child to go through life fearing dogs. There are a few strategies you can teach your child that will help them deal with dogs that appear overly aggressive, even if they are only being playful.
As dog owners, there are also ways to train your dog to behave more gently around children. We will explore both aspects so that you may gain some insight that will help your child overcome the fear of dogs.
Teaching your Child Behaviors that will help overcome the fear of dogs
It is often for difficult for children to understand that when a dog, twice their size, comes bounding up with tail wagging trying to lick them that the dog means them no harm. One of the first things you can do to help your child overcome the fear of dogs is to explain dog behavior to them. Regardless of their age level or understanding, it is easy to explain how a dog acts when it is happy to see you.
Understanding is one of the first keys to overcoming the fear of dogs.
Behaviors that help calm your child and the dog
There are also certain behaviors that your child must understand which will affect the way in which a dog reacts to them. Their behavior can cause a dog to react in a way which helps calm the child’s fear of the dog, or exacerbates the dog’s behavior and the child’s fear at the same time.
Things your child should not do to get along with a dog
The first reaction children who are afraid of dogs usually have is to run away, scream, and flap their arms. This is effective in communicating their fear to you, but gives a completely different signal to the dog. Most dogs interpret this as play behavior, thus, they may become more animated and aggressive in their attempt to play.
Straighten out this mixed signal by teaching your child to try their best to react calmly, regardless of how they feel when a dog comes their way. This is easier said than done, but with repeated practice, it can become a habit. Once a child sees that the dog does not become more animated when they are not flapping, running, and screaming, the child’s behavior will be reinforced.
How to handle dogs even when your child is afraid
As an adult I have been chased by many dogs when running. You never quite know which ones are protecting their territory, or which ones want to attack you for coming near their territory. Often, there is fear of the dog or fear of the dog’s behavior.
I handle this one of two ways and both can also be used by children who are afraid of dogs.
One method is to ignore the dog. More often than not, this will work. Children who are afraid of dogs can implement this same behavior. When a dog, obviously your own or one they know, a very effective technique is for the child to cross their arms and turn away. The dog quickly gets the signal that the child does not wish to play.
I’ve seen my own nieces and nephews, ages 3 to 8, implement this with my horse-of-a-Golden Retriever, who is loving, but in her haste to show love could easily plow the kids down. On the other hand, we have advised other, adult, guests to do the same thing if they don’t want her to bother them. Instead, they continue to flail their hands and jerk around. Bailey gets the signal that these adults want to play and continues to play with them, which is not the adult’s idea of fun. (I didn’t mention any names, mother.)
Another method I use with dogs, when I’m running and they give chase, is to slow down or stop and speak in calm gentle tones. The dog usually calms down, as I continue to walk backward, or continues forward to be petted.
Kids can also try talking gently to a dog that is being a bit rambunctious; however, this should usually be implemented after the child has overcome their initial fear of a familiar or family dog. Children should be warned that stray dogs are not always friendly, but don’t throw your child back into fear of all dogs by mentioning this early in your child’s training to overcome their fear of dogs.
The owner’s responsibility in dog training
Obviously, it is ultimately the owner’s responsibility to train their dog to behave around others. Thankfully, Bailey, the Golden Retriever is smart. She has made our responsibility as dog owners much easier.
We use two commands to call Bailey down. One is simply “Get down.” This was easy enough to teach when she jumps on us. Sometimes, during play, we allow her to jump up and even encourage it. However, when we are in dress clothes, it is not an appropriate time to play.
Obviously Bailey doesn’t notice a difference in what we are wearing, so we simply taught her “Get down,” when it is not time to jump and play. A gentle sweep to get her away from the body and repeating the command “get down” over and over was easy to teach her.
Now, we are able to call her down when she begins to jump on others.
Because Bailey is so large, it is easy for her to become too rough in play without realizing it. When our nieces and nephews overcame their fear of Bailey because of her size and decided they wanted to play with her we had to teach her one additional simple command: “easy.”
When Bailey is playing with children or being introduced to others she responds to “easy” by exhibiting self-control. To teach her this command we simple had to pull her back gently by her collar when she got overly excited, while at the same time saying “easy.” As she was first learning the command, we would hold her back slightly, so she could only smell or be petted by children. At the same time we would repeat the command.
Now, the command “easy” works when Bailey approaches children or even smaller dogs, with which she loves to play.
She is a rambunctious, fun-loving Golden Retriever who wouldn’t harm anyone. Our biggest concern is that she would lick a burglar to death, but because of her size and playful nature we had to train her to calm herself down.
Helping your child overcome the fear of dogs
As your child begins to become more comfortable with dogs, make sure that he or she is around them enough not to forget what they have learned and develop new fears.
If you have a family pet, teach your child to help water and feed the pet and create time for the child and pet to bond. Allow the child to help your dog practice tricks or play games, like fetch.
You attitude toward your child’s fear and the dog will determine how quickly and easily your child can overcome their fear of dogs.
