Kink Aware Professionals is an organization that is run by the NCSF (National Coalition for Sexual Freedom) and is available for psychologists, psychiatrists, doctors and lawyers to list their services as friendly towards people in the swinger, BDSM and poly scenes. Kink Aware Professionals now includes listings from all over the world even though it started as a service for those living in Canada and the USA. Professionals aren’t screened by the NCSF but are added when they themselves contact the organization to offer their services. You will need personal reviews of someone’s service. Do not think that these professionals offer great service just because they are on this list. If you have a bad experience with a professional in your area, please spread the word and make sure that others are warned. None of the KAP on the list of the NCSF offers sexual services. They are all lawyers, doctors and therapists.
Psychiatrists and psychologists that are on this list will not treat you as someone who is insane or in need of hospitalization because they have read up on the psychological aspects of BDSM and know why people choose this lifestyle. They are generally aware of support groups in your area and should be able to refer you. They should be able to tell you when your need for BDSM is causing you to be less effective in life. These professionals will treat you with the respect you would normally get from other psychiatrists even if you weren’t involved in something like this lifestyle. Personal opinion and belief does not cloud the judgment of a KAP in this case.
As an example, a dominant woman I know went to go see a KAP after her break up with her husband of 20 years. This person knew exactly how to talk to her in order not to seem judgmental or bossy. She convinced her to talk about the effect BDSM had on the relationship since both partners were dominant and he had fallen in love with a submissive woman whom he replaced her with ultimately. She also did not give the dominant woman tasks that would generally work with submissives such as long reams of homework, but treated her with the dominant mindset as a basis from which to be moving forward.
She scheduled some “group” therapy with the estranged husband and wife as well as the new submissive partner after retaining consent from her client as the relationship between the three was affable. Her aim was to see how the relationship could be used to heal the insecurities my friend faced. The submissive partner was told that she could assume the position she normally assumed at home when attending on her partner, which left her free to kneel at his feet. The two dominant people discussed the situation as if she was not there at all, which frequently happens in the BDSM world and is not seen as abuse since the submissive has given control to her dominant partner. She was to be sent over to her partner’s estranged wife’s home to receive a weekly spanking for six weeks. The dominant male also had to change what assistance he was offering to his wife to leave her in a better position financially. These were just some of the steps that they decided on.
As you can see this therapy is different from what you would expect, but it alleviated the shame and guilt the submissive woman felt, helped the dominant male to see what his responsibilities were with both women and also helped the dominant woman to see that the submissive woman had no intention of diminishing her or disrespecting her place in the relationship even though the two were no longer husband and wife. My friend could walk away from the pain and now understood why everything had happened and how there were things about it that simply could never have been different. Today this little group of people plays together and are great friends.
The KAP that helped them is not in the BDSM lifestyle but she does not feel any need not to use traditional BDSM methods in treatment. In fact she has begun to use some BDSM fundamentals in her treatment of people not in the lifestyle by looking at their general attitude and personality. She would treat “submissive” people using some BDSM principles and has had great success. Both the psychologist and my friend have given me permission to discuss their case with you.
KAP can also be found in the medical community. When would you need a doctor that understands the physiological results and consequences of BDSM? Well for one thing in an emergency after or during a scene you would do well to be able to go see the doctor that regularly examines your submissive and knows the tattoos, the welts and other signs of play. It leads to less embarrassment, will not lead to a report being filed for abuse and will also help to treat the wounds or welts keeping the longer term effects of that type of play and its consequences in mind. A doctor will also be able to give you advice on how to keep your submissive safe in any scene and how to handle any medical conditions your submissive might have. The submissive can go for regular check ups and her physical health will always remain a priority for this doctor who will work with you instead of against you.
Lawyers also offer their services to people in BDSM. Cases that they would specialize in would include cases where a dominant is accused of inflicting bodily harm or when a dominant and submissive end a relationship and there is conflict regarding who gets what despite a contract that is not legally binding in any country. Lawyers will also be able to give advice on how to draw up contracts that could stand up in court like employee contracts and could assist dominants and submissives with their estate if they die. BDSM practitioners who have been evicted from apartment buildings have used kink friendly lawyers too.
BDSM practitioners also use them in child custody battles and sometimes even when a submissive or dominant is unfairly discharged from work. Sexual harassment cases and rape cases have also been handled by KAP as the sexual preferences of a victim is often used against them and these lawyers know the psychology and reality of BDSM. Some of them are also well versed in international law on BDSM sometimes and have been consulted when BDSM practitioners had to make immigration decisions.
The above examples were just some illustrations of when a Kink Aware Professional comes in handy. A list of KAP’s can be found on the following link if you need to make use of their services: http://www.ncsfreedom.org/index.php?option=com_keyword&id;=282 . If you know of any professionals who are kink friendly, please let them know of this service and ask them to join.
