Everyone with fibro dreads that one awful word. “Flare.” It can cause a wince from those girls (and guys) in the know, and is often all the explaination you need to give to your fellow fibro sufferers when cancelling a date or explaining an extra-bad mood. We all worry about when the next one is going to hit- but how many of us prepare for it?
Like the Boy Scouts, being prepared can be your best course of action when it comes to a flare- and I will share with you my few steps that have helped me get through a flare with the least stress to my (often too painful) body and mind. I don’t know if my shortcuts help shorten my flares- but I know these steps make flares easier to bear, and thus when they do hit I’m not freaking out about how I’m going to get dinner on the table for my husband, or how I’m going to keep the house clean for him, or how I’m going to get through the day.
Stockpile food. This probably sounds like an “end of the world” scenario, but it’s simply advice for how to make eating easier on a taxed body. While I’m feeling good, I cook up a meal or two that’s double-sized, and I freeze the double-size portion. Generally, it’s a meal that’s easy to do this way, like spaghetti or a hearty stew. Sticking half of it in the freezer will guarantee that no one will overeat, and it’ll also guarantee that when you’re feeling cruddy and don’t want to have to stand in front of the stove and cook, you don’t have to. Pop a frozen dinner into the microwave to defrost (or, even better, into the sink the night before to let it defrost, and then into the slow-cooker on “warm”) and then heat it up, and you haven’t done any work and you’ve got a hot, home-made meal on the table.
Split dinner duty. This, of course, is for those married people with fibro- I know not every person with fibro is married. I know a lot of spouses don’t like to cook, but when you’re hurting, and you really can’t do it, delegate. Even if it means the spouse says “ok, do you want pizza or Chinese?” Along these lines, if your child is 12 or older, start teaching them to cook. It’s a good skill for them to learn, and it means you’ll have one more set of hands to help you when you need the help.
USE those medications the doctor prescribed for you! Time and again I hear people with fibro say “oh, I never take (x drug) even though my doctor prescribed it for me.” The only person you are hurting is yourself when you do that! Take your medicine, people! The flexeril, soma, tramadol, and all the other medications out there that the doctors prescribe for pain and muscle tension DO work and they ARE there to help you. I understand not wanting to be addicted as well as the next person, but especially during a flare, they ARE necessary. Don’t be a martyr. Would you expect a person with arthritis not to take their medication? Then why are you not taking yours?
Let the dust bunnies sit. Again, this one might seem logical, but we fibromyalgia people seem to be among those people that are called “perfectionists.” And no perfectionist likes to see a dust trail on their TV or a water ring on their coffee table. But you can cut back when you’re flaring. If you have a dishwasher- use it! Even if you live alone, stick your dishes in the dishwasher and use it every 3 days if you can’t stand running it only with a few cups and plates in it. If you aren’t lucky enough to have a dishwasher, don’t wash the dishes after every meal- letting your breakfast bowl sit in the sink until after dinner won’t kill you, and the amount of time it takes you to wash the bowl and the plates from breakfast, lunch, and dinner will probably equal out- and it’s less time you have to stand on your feet.
Use FMLA. This is a big one. But really- if you have medical leave, and you need it, use it. That’s what it is there for. Also, under the Americans with Disabilities act, your workplace is required to meet your needs for comfort. So if your chair sucks and is killing your back? Request a different one. Talk to your Human Resources if you have to. Don’t be afraid to speak up for yourself! You need to take care of yourself- you are the only advocate you have.
Drink water. I don’t know why we people with fibro don’t drink more water, but studies say we don’t. And it really is one of the best things we can do for ourselves. Drinking water will keep your skin soft and keep your body hydrated. It’ll keep your kidneys working, and keep any toxins (including your medications) from overworking your system. If you can’t stand plain water, there are plenty of flavored waters with good taste and no calories to get in the way- just be careful of what sugar substitute they use. Some of the “fake sugars” are not so good for us.
Look into yoga. I’ve written another article about the benefits of yoga for fibro, but I really can’t stress it enough. I recently read an article written by the medical teams studying fibro that links the muscle pain of fibro to lessened blood flow to the muscles- yoga will help counteract that, and is really one of the best things we can do to help our bodies, even when they are in flare.
Get plenty of sleep. I know it sucks to work an eight hour day, come home, eat dinner, and go to sleep- but when you are in a flare, sometimes it’s the best thing you can do for your body. We already know that those of us with fibro don’t sleep like normal people, so when our bodies are demanding more sleep, it’s better to give it to them than to fight them and possibly prolong the flare.
Don’t isolate yourself. This might sound counterintuitive to the previous number, but it’s proven that upbeat contact with friends will raise your immune system and help you fight off any bugs you might pick up- so keep in touch with those friends who are sympathetic and compassionate to your situation, and don’t let the others drag you down.
Journal! Writing down when you get too upset or angry to keep your feelings inside can be very cathartic and can help you to process things you may not realize that you’re feeling consciously. Indeed, keeping a journal is recommended for people with fibro to help keep track of our symptoms- it can really help to isolate triggers, too.
Remember you’re not alone. Flares are hard to deal with for everyone, and everyone crashes from time to time. Keep your chin up- find a support group (there are a lot of great ones online!), talk to a sympathetic friend, call your parents, or just write in that journal I recommended a moment ago. Just know that today isn’t the end- tomorrow will be better.
I hope these tips will help you the way they helped me. And remember- You may have fibro, but fibro doesn’t have you.
