If you are a friend or family member of a person who has Fibromyalgia, it is vital that you educate yourself thoroughly on the condition. Fibromyalgia can be a very complicated condition for the sufferer, as well as those people the sufferer comes in close contact with. It is not easy to detect when a person has Fibromyalgia because you cannot see the effects of the illness visibly. Many times, people may take for granted that a person is truly sick if they cannot visibly see the illness. In this article, I will explain general ways that a person can understand Fibromyalgia if they are a friend or family member of a sufferer.
The first way that you can understand Fibromyalgia, if you are a friend or family member of a sufferer is to learn as much as you possibly can regarding the illness. One of the most important things that you should grow to understand about Fibromyalgia is that it consists of numerous symptoms. This comes because of the illness stemming from an issue within the sufferers central nervous system. With the Fibromyalgia sufferer, there is also a lot of pain that stems from muscles and the soft tissues in the body and the fact that they lack the strength and ability to replenish themselves as healthy person’s muscles and tissues do. When you mix all of these sensitivities together, you have a wide range of symptoms and complaints. Many Fibromyalgia sufferers may express the fact to you that they are in pain, others may mention it briefly, and still some may not mention it at all. Just be aware that the person does suffer, whether they talk about it or not.
As a friend or family member of a Fibromyalgia sufferer, you may find that the person does not seem to be the type that likes to touch through handshakes, hugs, and so on. It is important to understand that this is not truly personal. As a sufferer of Fibromyalgia, I have hurt the feelings of others because I shy away from hugging and other types of physical activity, like play wrestling and so on. It is hard to explain to people that you simply hurt very badly at times, and it is easier to avoid these activities to save yourself some physical pain. If you know a Fibromyalgia sufferer that does this, do not take offense to it. We may really want to play around and hug and other things, but sometimes, the pain is so overwhelming, we just cannot.
If you are trying to understand Fibromyalgia because you are a friend or family member of a sufferer, you should understand that it is often difficult for the sufferer to make plans and commit to things. Some days, it is very hard to simply get out of bed. Other days, it takes all that we have to simply clean the house – even if the mess is small. I have found that my family and friends often do not understand why I do not visit them very often, or why I do not make plans with them very often. It is very hard to explain that I must use the energy that my body has as efficiently as possible. I have two children, both boys. My oldest is six years old and my youngest is four years old. I home school them, and write for various online venues. In addition, I keep house and do most of the shopping. Because of the amount of things that I have to do, it is difficult at times, to exert any more energy. It is important to me not to allow my immediate family to suffer, so, many times I have to postpone activities with friends and other family members. It is not that I want to; it just ends up that way sometimes. Do not be offended if you live outside of the home of the Fibromyalgia sufferer, and do not see them very often. Just try to understand it. Keep in touch as often as you are able by email, instant messaging, snail mail, and/or telephone. Not only will it keep the relationship positive and productive, it will mean a lot to the Fibromyalgia sufferer that you care and are willing to step up and take the plate when they are sometimes unable to.
If you are working to understand Fibromyalgia, there is another important aspect that you should be aware. Fibromyalgia sufferers often lack the characteristics of a good memory. This is often referred to as “Fibro Fog”. It is often difficult to remember small details. We may misplace items frequently, or have to be reminded of things often. It is not that we purposely forget important details, we actually try very hard to remember them, and it is just that it is a part of our illness. If you are a friend of family member of a Fibromyalgia sufferer, it is important to understand fibro fog and accept it.
The above listed suggestions are really just the tip of the iceberg when dealing with a friend or family member that has Fibromyalgia. There are many other things that you can do to assist the person with Fibromyalgia as well. The Fibromyalgia sufferer will not ask for help. It is partly from pride, and the other part is not wanting to inconvenience others. Please refer to the following list for other ways that you may assist the sufferer:
- If you must do some shopping, call the sufferer to see if they would like to ride with you or if you can pick up anything for them. It is often difficult to get out of the house, drive, and walk around a large store if you are in pain. This would help them a lot.
- If the sufferer has children, offer to take them for a couple of hours or come over to sit with them so that the sufferer can enjoy a warm bath, or a nap. It is often quite nice to be some peace and quiet – especially if the home is always bursting with energy.
- You may want to help the sufferer with various tasks, such as cleaning up the house, laundry, and/or yard work. It is often difficult to perform these tasks, and the help will be appreciated.
- Keep in touch with the sufferer. They often feel as if they burden people, and that people may not care anymore…if you keep in contact with them and let them know that they are still loved and valued, they will be very thankful.
- The Fibromyalgia patient must keep their doctor appointments. If you are able, encourage them to pursue treatments and medical care. One way you can do this is to offer to take them to appointments or ride with them.
