A fan speaks:
I am an admitted Dr. Phil admirer. I think the man is amazing, and I wish I had one-tenth the reasoning skills that he possesses.
Why? Well, for one thing I was always one of those people who grew up never learning from my mistakes. For some reason I felt compelled to repeat them, always hoping for a different outcome (where was Dr. Phil when I needed him).
I would see what everybody else saw – obvious “red flags” – but to me they appeared as neon “Go” signs and I followed them blindly. Then, to my surprise (the results of ignoring red flags always surprised me), I would be stupefied and wonder, usually out loud – What just happened?
But now, thanks to Dr. Phil, I’m learning how to recognize what works and what doesn’t work in my life. Sadly, and it pains me to say this, I’m Dr. Phil’s age, but until scientists learn how to clone the reasoning portions of genius brains and transplant them into needy brains, I’m stuck with mine.
Because I’m an avid watcher of his show, I’ve noticed a series of terms he often uses. I call them “Philsms,” philosophical bits of wisdom from the mind of Dr. Phil. He generously offers practical advice for people like me who are desperately in need of guidance.
What follows are some of my favorite philisms. One common philism you will likely hear is:
I’m not going to throw you under the bus.
Any time any of Dr. Phil’s guests appear to be slightly uncomfortable, because they KNOW Dr. Phil can see through their façade, Dr. Phil assures them that he is not going to throw them under the bus.
Before Dr. Phil came along, I never thought of throwing anybody under a bus and I wondered, would the bus be moving or sitting still? I often think of every literal translation for any comment made and this one initially had me stumped.
If he wasn’t going to throw the person under the bus by the tires, was he referring to the luggage compartment under the bus? Sometimes his philisms are difficult to decipher.
So, after considering every aspect of what “throwing somebody under the bus” meant, I had to assume that Dr. Phil was not going to put his guests in harm’s way or to hurt them.
Another philism I had never heard was:
This ain’t my first rodeo.
The man is from Texas though, so I wasn’t surprised to hear about rodeos.
Yes, Dr. Phil has been around. He has written a number of books about some very important topics, including:
Relationship Rescue: A Seven-Step Strategy for Reconnecting with Your Partner
The Ultimate Weight Solution: The 7 Keys to Weight Loss Freedom
Family First: Your Step-by-Step Plan for Creating a Phenomenal Family
Real Life: Preparing for the 7 Most Challenging Days of Your Life
and
Life Strategies: Doing What Works, Doing What Matters
He knows from experience that his methods work and he KNOWS the ropes. Guests understand that they shouldn’t try to pull the wool over this man’s eyes, because even if they succeed, Dr. Phil will still see right through them anyway.
And “I get it” (not quite a philism, but he says it a lot) – the Dr. Phil show is a rodeo and we’re all along for the ride.
Are you kidding me?
This philism must be one of Dr. Phil’s favorite comments. He generally grabs both arms of his chair and leans forward as he says it. I can visualize this comment slapping his guests in their heads without actually physically slapping them. I can hear without his speaking the words, WAKE UP! Those four smack-em-in-the-head words – are you kidding me – pack a punch.
And they work. Dr. Phil gets a reaction. People start squirming in their seats while he awaits their response. At the risk of making themselves look stupid, they look almost as if they are saying to themselves, “Quick, come up with something to say.” And if they don’t immediately come up with something, he adds four more words,
What were you thinking?
Stops the guests dead in their tracks and makes them wonder, yeah what WAS I thinking? And why can’t I have a brain that functions like Dr. Phil’s brain functions? This philism, combined with the “Are you kidding me?” philism, requires the guest to respond.
At this point guests start explaining themselves, and after his guests have made excuse after excuse, and offered reason after reason and justification after justification, after they have backed themselves into a corner, and after their explanations have made no impact whatsoever on Dr. Phil, he asks,
How’s that working for you?
Obviously he knows, because they are sitting next to him, that it hasn’t worked at all.
The audience, though, because they know this man and his philisms, has been waiting for him to ask this question and has been wondering why he waited so long to ask it. We, the home viewing audience, anticipate this question too. The payoff is phenomenal. We all, including his guests, laugh and await the answer we know is coming – it isn’t.
Though Dr. Phil often offers insights gained from growing up with an alcoholic father who made his own “isms”, all the philisms you’ve read so far are my favorite philisms. But of all the philisms, one in particular stands as my all-time favorite:
Home should be a soft place to fall.
I love the sound of this phrase. It encompasses everything I believe home should be – a place where children feel welcomed and loved, a place where family members know, with certainty, that they are precious and important, and that when they fall down, loving arms will tenderly hold them and guide them back on their feet. The phrase denotes tenderness and caring, and I love it.
If you’re eager to hear more philisms, visit Dr. Phil’s web site at http://drphil.com/ and if you know of somebody willing to clone the reasoning part of Dr. Phil’s brain, message me.
