Richie Zambora, famed guitarist of Bon Jovi, was arrested for investigation of driving under the influence of alcohol on Tuesday night.
Zambora, 48, was arrested just before 11 p.m., after a police officer saw his black Hummer weaving in and out of traffic lanes. There were three unidentified passengers in the car, including one woman and two girls.
Richie Zambora has been linked to some of the famous actresses of Hollywood. According to “Who’s Dated Who,” Zambora has been links to Courtney Cox, Bekka Bramlett, Cher, Ally Sheedy, Heather Locklear and Denise Richards. The tabloid headlines were full of stories about the love triangle of Locklear, Richards and Zambora last year. After Zambora’s divorce from Heather Locklear, the rock star started to date her former best friend, Denise Richards.Denise Richards had recently divorced Charlie Sheen.
News reports on television and on the Internet have given conflicting statements about Zambora’s past alcohol rehab. I have heard reports of one week and one month in that were spent in rehab earlier this year.
I have been close to a person who was in alcohol rehab not once, but several times. My initial reaction to the news that Zambora had been in rehab was that one week, or one month of rehab is not a miracle cure. To imply that Zambora’s problem should have been solved was naive.
Alcoholism is a painful disease, that spells chaos, pain and humiliation for the alcoholic and the those close to the alcoholic. Unless you have been personally touched by the destruction that is alcoholism, it is hard to impossible to understand.
I had an alcoholic in my life. The alcoholic was on a downward spiral that I could not pull him out of. He went into rehab several times.
People tend to think the alcoholic goes into rehab and comes out all better. That is not the case. Short term alcoholism rehab does little more that dry out the alcoholic. From my observation, one week is probably not going to to the trick, unless there is a miracle that goes along with it.
One of the most difficult steps for the alcoholic is to admit that they are not in control of their drinking. This step, which is Step One of the Twelve Step Program of Alcoholics Anonymous, is essential to eventual cure.
Many times, alcoholics do not really want to go into rehab. They go into rehab because a friend, family member or legal authority pushes them into it. Unfortunately, the rehab is not likely to be successful unless the alcoholic has made the decision to quit drinking themselves.
Even if the alcoholic goes into rehab with sincere good intentions, there are pitfalls every step on the way to recovery. Rehab provides a safe temporary sanctuary while providing tools to the alcoholic. Once the alcoholic leaves rehab, they are often dropped back into the world they know. Friends and family members, who drink themselves, can be major stumbling blocks to the alcoholic’s recovery.
People around the alcoholic may not want to stop drinking, but to drink in front of the alcoholic is like holding out candy in front of a child. If you feel that you have to drink in front of a alcoholic, maybe you need to evaluate your own relationship to alcohol. Is drinking is front of an alcoholic worth their possible demise? It is cruel to hold out temptation to the struggling person.
I watched my alcoholic at family functions. His family was very much into alcohol. They were arrogant about drinking in front of him. They knew he had a serious problem. but couldn’t stop their own alcohol use to save his life. His brother even held a major party, but didn’t invite the alcoholic because alcohol would be served. This may give you an idea of the family priorities.
Recovering alcoholics should avoid situations where alcohol will be served. People around the alcoholic should not drink in front of them.
In the end, his life wasn’t saved.
In retrospect, there is not much an individual can do to stop someone else from drinking. However, to drink in front of a alcoholic glamorizes drinking. The alcoholic feels inferior around people who seem to be able to “handle’ alcohol.
The feeling of inferiority feeds into their other feelings of worthlessness and shame, as the alcoholic spirals downward. The alcoholic is especially vulnerable when they are just out of rehab. They may be sober, but they still have to deal with the consequences of their actions. Often the shame is more than they can bear, which drives them back to the bottle.
To support an alcoholic after rehab, friends and family members should not drink in front of them. This is a minimal amount of support that people around the alcoholic can offer.
Rehab is like putting a band aid on a gushing arterial bleed. Rehab may be the best tool we have, but it often isn’t enough.
This was my reaction to the statement that Zambora had been in rehab. I have no idea what kind of family support the rock star has. However, the statement about rehab implied that Zambora should have been all better and should not have been caught driving under the influence. This statement bothered me, because I know that alcoholism is a complicated problem that is not easily fixed by a week, or a month, in rehab.
Rehab isn’t the last step, it is the beginning of a long journey to recovery.
Read Heath Ledger, Anna Nicole and The Rest of Us.
Read Rehab for Eddie Van Halen.
Read British Alcohol Industry.
Read Britney’s Break From Rehab.
Read Alcohol Not All Servings Created Equal.
Read Valerie Bertinelli 40 Pound Weight Loss.
