Have you heard of these ceremonies called Purity Balls? If not you might in the coming years as they are getting quite popular, especially among the Evangelical Christians. According to Leslee Unruh, the founder of Abstinence Clearinghouse, there were more than 1,400 Purity Balls in 2006 and they are expecting that number to double by this year.
These Balls have several dozen fathers and daughters attending at the same time. There is alot of praying as well as dancing, giving of purity rings or chastity jewelry. There are many websites that cater to just purity jewelry on the internet. One such website was chastityjewelry.com. There I found they can buy rings for as low as $30.00 to well over $200.00.
Complete with white cake, girls dressed in long gowns and fathers sporting tuxedos, these ceremonies remind you of a wedding. This almost occult like phenomena is becoming a huge trend among the Christian Conservatives across the United States.
These Purity Balls are extremely elaborate ceremonies where girls as young as nine years old pledge to their father’s that they will stay virgins until they marry. The father’s pledge to protect their daughter’s chastity and sign a covenant stating he will live an unblemished life, keeping his mind pure by doing such things as not using pornography and staying faithful to the girls mother.
According to Feministing.com the pledge the fathers make to their daughters is this:
I, [daughter’s name]’s father, choose before God to cover my daughter as her authority and protection in the area of purity. I will be pure in my own life as a man, husband and father. I will be a man of integrity and accountability as I lead, guide and pray over my daughter and as the high priest in my home. This covering will be used by God to influence generations to come.
The father’s then put purity rings or chastity bracelets on their daughters that the girls are supposed to give to their husbands on their wedding night. The daughters then lay down a while rose in front of a large cross as a symbol to live a pure lives before God.
Many critics and health professionals say these fathers and the Balls may be doing more harm than good. While teaching abstinence is a good thing, you also need to make these girls aware of sexually transmitted diseases. They point out that as many as 88% of girls who take these Purity Pledges go on to break them in as little as 4 years, often times engaging in dangerous unprotected sex with many partners.
Because these girls come from Highly religious families, they are likely to be shamed by their families if they are caught.
Is this a good idea then, or is it distasteful for a father to try and control his teen age daughters sex life. Does this mean the father owns the girls sexuality until she marries? The girls father will be the only man in her life until she is courted by a man and this Purity Ball is the only date she will be allowed tohave until she is courted. This seems like a lifestyle right out of biblical times.
Can a girl of nine really understand what the Ball and the pledge she makes to her father is really all about? Are these Balls teaching girls that they need to have a man protect them at all times? Will these girls have trouble making decisions for themselves later on in life as a result of this?
Are the girl’s families setting them up for failure by making them attend a Purity Ball? In this day is it unrealistic to expect women to stay virgins until they marry?
In all the information I read for this article I didn’t come across anything that stated why the entire family didn’t attend the girls Purity Balls, the mother is nowhere to be found and I find that a little strange. Is this because in these familes it is the father that controls everything? Why are the daughters the only ones attending these Purity Balls. Where are the mother son Purity Balls?
Instead of telling little girls this is a wonderful thing and letting them play dress up and attend what looks like a incestual wedding. Women and girls should be given the tools and education to make informed decisions about their own sexual lives, so they know later on in life how to protect themselves. Forced abstinence isn’t going to protect anyone from STD’s or unwanted pregnancies. It’s only a way of controlling women’s sexual choices and showing them that they have no voice.
