Panera Bread may be the place that my girlfriend and I frequent most in order to get a delicious and inexpensive meal. As with any people at any restaurant we have our favorite selections that we choose from. Both of us love the California Mission Salad that first appeared at Panera this summer. Their soups are quite possibly the best that I have ever had from a chain restaurant. The “wife” (as my friends call her) and I have even begun heading to Panera for breakfast. Their bagels and breakfast sandwiches are mouthwatering.
We had never been disappointed at a Panera. Whether it was in Erie, PA or Hoboken, NJ our Panera experience was always a great one. That is, until last Friday night, when everything that we believed in became a horrible lie. Both us had were intrigued by the advertisements that had been on television, radio, and in newspapers as of late. Panera was now going to offer its own pizzas or “Crispanis.” Panera and pizza? This is brilliant!
Panera’s official website describes its new creation as “super-delicious, hand-crafted pizza made with fresh, all-natural toppings and a perfect flatbread crust.” This immediately grabbed my attention and I hurried to display this to my beloved. She was more excited about the prospect of a slice of heaven in our mouths than I was, and insisted that we head out to Panera instantly. Panera Bread had never failed us before, and we were assured that a Crispani would be the best pizza that either of us had ever tasted.
Oh how wrong we were. We had no idea what we were getting into that fateful day when we voiced our order to the friendly young lady across the counter. Needless to say the events that transpired afterwards have shaped our lives to this day. It is very difficult to discuss, yet I will do my best to put into words my feelings of that regrettable day.
Alright, it wasn’t that traumatic, but obviously both my sweetie and I were less than happy with what we were served. M.J. (my dearest) ordered a Tomato and Basil Crispani while I chose the Three-Cheese Crispani. We anxiously awaited our order to come, and when it arrived to our table we could barely wait to dig in. The Crispanis looked scrumptious and smelled just as good.
A few seconds later we were reminded as to why the good Lord gave us more than two senses. Upon lifting up my first slice of this mockery of a pizza pie I noticed that my hands had curiously become white as snow. The pizza had so much dough that white flakes not only covered my hands but the plate it came on as well as the table we were at. I wasn’t sure if I should take a bite or hurl a snowball across the table.
Not wanting to cause a scene I disregarded my urge to create Christmas at Panera and decided to taste my dinner. Since M.J. and I share everything, I did experience both of the Crispanis we ordered. I awaited the “super-delicious” flavor that I read about online, and I can say with full confidence that as I write this I am still waiting for it. The sauce on the Tomato and Basil Crispani was weak and bland and could barely be tasted. The Three-Cheese Crispani tasted more like garlic bread instead of a pizza.
The two of us glanced at our food and then each other with the same shocked look. It wasn’t that this was pizza was awful. It just wasn’t great. It wasn’t Panera quality. This was the first time that we had been to a Panera and not loved our decision to go there. The crust was too flat (even for flatbread) and the cheese had very little flavor. The “doughiness” of the pizza made it even less appealing. It just wasn’t very good.
In this writer’s opinion Panera is still the only chain restaurant that I will go to when I desire something tasty from the deli. I can’t imagine any other establishment having a more flavorful French Onion soup. It is the wife’s new favorite breakfast stop and probably will be for the foreseeable future. However, if you want a good pizza, Domino’s, Pizza Hut, or Papa John’s is the recommendation of this critic. Crispani gets a sad one out of five stars on my scale.
