As we have discussed in the past, Humility is the tough one. In fact the title of this open letter: “Humility is the Solid Foundation of all Virtues” is a quote by Confucius that reminds me of the difficulty that a lack of humility has caused me in my life.
Although a lack of humility often takes many forms, it has always manifested within me a degree of arrogance and self-importance which proscribed a sober perspective of self worth and actually masked qualities such as kindness, understanding and loyalty which I was wanting to depict.
Do not mistake humility (described by Aristotle as a meta-virtue) with timidity, self-abasement or self-denigration. It is a degree of self confidence that discounts the need to preach your own resume, allowing others to discover your talents through the actions you exhibit in a humble but aggressive quest of accomplishment.
Humility is the process of controlling your own ego and exalting the efforts and achievements of others. It is rejecting personal adulation and praising the achievements of the team or corporation, all the while paying witness to everyday people who have the ability “to take out the wash” without drawing attention to themselves. It is listening with empathy and not considering what to say next. It is evaluating the merit of criticism and providing a constructive response. It is an understanding that humility is a source of strength and not submissiveness.
Learn to recognize times where swallowing your pride will prevent you from losing grace in no-win situations. Accept the fact that you can not always save people from themselves and the ability to recognize that tipping point will be critical. At some point, you must ask whether the correction of others is relative to your needs.
Practice in the mirror saying these three magic words: “You are right.” Seek the input of honest brokers when evaluating leadership and personal character traits, share credit for success with others and reinforce the philosophy for your constituents.
Humility improves relationships, both horizontally and vertically and removes anxiety. Humility will allow you to stand in the presence of something larger then yourself; something that is infinite, transcendent and pervades all things.
The right choice is being neither a bully nor a wimp, while tempering righteous superiority with sensible pragmatism that teaches you not to believe your own bullshit.
