Tired of “blaming it on the dog”, or is your dog developing a complex about being blamed for your gas? Problems with heartburn or indigestion? Well, you can try the chalky, foul tasting Tums, or you can spell relief R-o-l-a-i-d-s like I do. We currently have a bottle of fruit flavored Rolaids in our medicine cabinet and it is available in other flavors, all of which taste better than Tums to us.
I often take a rolaids before bed, nothing is much more annoying than waking up in the middle of the night with heartburn or acid indigestion. If I take a Tums, usually it will take water or some kind of soda to wash the taste away, thus making for another reason to have to get up in a couple of hours. It is hard enough once past forty to sleep through the night without having to stagger out of bed to the bathroom, so drinking liquids at bed time is a no no iif one wants to avoid that situation.
Rolaids, made by Pfizer, were created in the late 1920’s by a man named Irvine W. Grote. The product came in a foil roll, thus the name Rolaids. The company sponsors the Major League Baseball Rolaids Relief Man of The Year, going to the relief pitcher of the year in the eyes of the presenters. Out in the bullpen, especially in indoor stadiums, one would think the relief pitchers would appreciate their teammates having the product on hand. After all, baseball players are noted for among other things,grabbing their crotches, spitting tobacco, eating sunflower seeds and farting, sometimes all at the same time.
One of the benefits of Rolaids is the pleasant taste of the fruit flavor. The regular isn’t bad, either. If one is going to be in an elevator or in any enclosed area, special care should be taken to have Rolaids in the pocket for the sake of others. There is not always a dog to blame gas on. To borrow a phrase from Seinfeld, Rolaids can “defunkify” some pretty severe methane gas. What Seinfeld fan can forget the episode in which Kramer feeds Beefarino to the Horse that pulls the horse driven carriage and the ensuing complaints from George’s future in laws? If K man had given the equine a Rolaids or two, a potentially explosive situation could have been averted.
Of course if Michael Richards could have kept the vitriol from spewing from his mouth last November, the man behind Kramer might still have a career. For more on that you may have an interest in an article from last November, Kramer vs. Kramer, or Michael Richards, a “loathesome, offensive brute?”
What with the PR problems for Michael Richards and Keith Richards’ claim to have snorted his late Father’s ashes, this has not been a good time to have the surname Richards. Maybe Rolaids could ease any heartburn brought about by such activities, maybe not.
Tums, while providing most of the same benefits as Rolaids, just does not taste nearly as good. That’s Tums, the antacid, not TUMS, the Tehran University of Medical Sciences, speaking of potentially explosive situations, or TUMS the Tulsa Users of Macintosh Society.
Neither product is recommended for pregnant women or those who are breast feeding, although a pregnant woman might not mind the taste of Tums as much as some of us. Rolaids has 175 more miligrams of calcium carbonate than Tums. Some even use Rolaids as a daily source of extra calcium.
Rolaids contains no sodium, it does not say on the bottle of Tums whether or not sodium is included in the ingredients. Regardless, Rolaids is listed as not only an antacid, but a calcium supplement, as well. The taste of the fruit flavor is better than any Tums I have ever had, with fast results when it comes to relieving heartburn, acid indigestion and gas. That’s how I spell relief!
