Not many people enjoy housecleaning, but it’s part of life. Unless they can afford to pay someone else to do the dirty work, why clean the house before it’s fully necessary? Instead of cleaning week after week and day after day, consider the following funny one-liners on housecleaning. You will gain a whole new perspective on the subject while saving time and money on cleaning supplies. Personally, I’d rather be fishing!
Housecleaning and the Kids
You know it’s time to start housecleaning when your seven year old daughter begins practicing her name in cursive on every piece of wood furniture in the house.
When the kids can practically swing from cobwebs that are as thick as ropes in their rooms, start cleaning before someone is accidentally strangled!
When you cannot find your busy toddler in the clutter, it’s time to hone your organization skills.
Housecleaning and Fur-Babies
When dust bunnies are being mistaken for real bunnies, it’s time to dust and mop the floors more often.
If the cat stops using his litter box because it’s full of landmines, it’s time to begin housecleaning for Kitty!
When the dog would rather sleep outside in the dirt than at the foot of your bed, think about changing those sheets and blankets.
If you feel like a mouse in a maze while walking through your own home, you’d better call 1-800-GOT-JUNK.
Housecleaning and Uninvited Company
If guests stop by and they ask if they can keep their shoes on, it’s time to think about washing the floors and cleaning those naturally decorated contemporary carpets.
When guests seem afraid to sit on the furniture, consider some major cleaning!
If guests ask if there is a pig farm down the street, and there isn’t one within miles, add housecleaning to your to-do list.
If company asks where the nearest public bathroom is, you’d better think about visiting the cleaning supply aisle just a little more often.
Basic Housecleaning Tips for the Cleaning Impaired
When it looks like you could grow plants in the bathtub, you’d better consider cleaning away that ring you`ve been working on for months.
When the five-second rule no longer applies, do some housecleaning!
When television technology seems to have reverted back to black and white, it’s time to try signing your name in cursive on the screen to see if it needs dusting or if TVLand is on every channel.
If there are more dishes in the sink and on the countertops than in the cupboards, think about housecleaning.
If the exhaust vents are gasping for air, you’d better think about cleaning before they die an early death!
If you have received offers to appear on the television show Hoarders, how about taking a few lessons in housecleaning?
Last but not least; when you have to get one inch away from a new Yankee candle to smell something pleasant in your house, it’s time to think about housecleaning!
