Today almost 4 million children live in households headed by their grandparents. Most of these arrangements have no court approval or supervision. And here is where trouble lies. Without legal power, grandparents find themselves helpless…
When a child needs the consent of a parent or legal guardian for any medical treatment
When the school near the grandparent’s house won’t allow the child to enroll without a formal custody order.
When the school won’t let the child participate in school activities that require a parent’s or guardian’s consent.Getting Custody
Before you go for custody, consider your own age, health, and financial circumstances. Ask yourself the following questions:
· Can you provide guidance and care for your grandchildren until they reach adulthood?
· Do you have the strength and stamina to care for them?
·?
If you can answer these questions to your satisfaction and decide to seek the legal custody of your grandchildren, keep in mind that the law in most states recognizes parental preference in child-custody disputes. This means that the law presumes that it is in the children’s best interests to be in the custody of their parents rather than in the custody of their grandparents.
If the parents agree to it, however, you can get custody. Discuss the situation with them. If all’s well you can file a petition in court.
When the Parents Are Unfit
If they don’t agree, you will have to prove that your son and daughter-in-law are unfit to care for their children. For example, they have abandoned them or have serious problems with drugs or alcohol. You may have to show police reports, get a social worker to testify and you may also testify.
While many parents who have abandoned their children don’t contest a custody award, others – either because they resent what they see as interference or because they regret having left their children – will contest a petition for custody.
Starting the Legal Ball Rolling
Draw up a petition, either on your own or with the help of a lawyer, asking that the court give you custody and order your son and daughter-in-law to pay child support. You will also need to notify the parents that you have begun the proceeding by issuing a summons. Get the official summons from the clerk of the court and work with the clerk to have it served, or delivered to them legally.
If your son and daughter-in-law have moved and you don’t know where they live, you may have to place a notice of your petition in the newspaper. This is called service by publication. The rules governing this kind of notice vary from place to place, and you may need a lawyer or grandparents’ rights organization to help you to do it legally. Otherwise your son and his wife can contest the custody decision later – a situation that will needlessly harm the children.
