In today’s world, there are many subcultures in the United States. With the United States being the one place everyone wants to go, due to the “American Dream,” it is only natural that the U.S. is filled with millions and millions of different races and cultures. One of those cultures is the culture of Black women.
Many will say that being Black is a total different experience from any other race. With society depicting a “man’s world” image, it’s even harder for women to succeed. Women are generally considered to be the weaker of the two genders. Today, the struggle of power still exists between both genders, especially with the role of parenting and in the job market, relationships, and degrading music.
Women, especially black women, are seen to be the stronger parental figure between the genders. According to the National Center for Health Statistics (NCHS), a sub-organization of the Center for Disease Control (CDC), there are about 5.7 million Black mothers in the United States. There are around 34 thousand teenage mothers, according to the NCHS. While this rate is down significantly from 1990, this evidence proves that many Black mothers start parenthood at a young age.
During the nursing stage of a baby’s life, a mother develops a special bond with her child(ren). This bond, according to Dr. Jim Sears, can be of several factors, which include breast-feeding to holding the baby. This bond is what help mothers become a strong authority in the household. Most children remember Mother’s Day before Father’s Day due to this strong bond, a bond lead to what Tiesha Baskins, a Monroe native, says is “unconditional love.
“I think that Black mothers are the strongest type of mothers because they care unconditionally,” she said. “With Black women, love or unconditional love is not just the same as plain old love. Unconditional love is the type of love where a person would do anything for that person.”
The struggle of a Black woman goes beyond the household and into the job market. The United States has a job market of a little over 203.4 million jobs, according to the 2000 Census from the U.S. Census Bureau. Of those jobs, women occupy 31.7% of those jobs, being a little over 64.5 million.
There has been a known history in the U.S. for it to be a “man’s world,” and the women just live in it. This has transcended upon the job market as well. Most women have the same qualifications as a man to do the same job, and the man will be picked due to sexism. Therefore, they generally receive the lower salaries and fewer benefits as their counterparts.
In 2003, according to the U.S. Census Bureau, a college-educated woman makes an average of $41,100 a year. According to the same source, white men took in an excess of $66,000 a year, while black men earned more than $45,000 a year. However, black women make more than college-educated white women ($37,800 a year) and Hispanic women ($37,600 a year).
Most women, however, believe that they will eventually get the same equal opportunities and salaries as men. Ashley Alford, a junior Education major at Grambling State University, believes that, despite the sexism, she still has a good opportunity to get a job.
“I’m a woman, and it makes you stand out because you’re a female,” said Alford, a Monroe, LA native. “I believe I should be treated equally. If I have the same qualifications as he does, I would like to get the same salary as he does.”
Baskins, a junior, has already prepared herself to work harder to prove herself to be as good, or even better, at the same job that men do.
“I feel like I’m going to have to work harder to become whatever I want to be,” the Psychology major said. “Personally, it’s not just a man’s world; it’s a woman’s world too. There are more women out there doing better than men can. I’m going to grad school so that I can get a better education and do better than that.”
According to the National Center for Education Statistics (NACS), there were 17.3 million college students in the U.S. during they year of 2004. Women accounted for 7.4 million of college students during that year. There was no information as to how many Black women were enrolled, but the total number of Blacks is listed as taking up 12.5% of the collegiate population.
The bulk of the collegiate population comes from women. Women made up 9.9 million of the population in 2004, and their numbers are increasing. Alford isn’t surprised that women make up more than of the collegiate population than men.
“I find that a lot of females come to class more than the males do,” she said. “We’re there almost everyday. I know it’s some females that miss class like it’s nothing. We’re not perfect, but sometimes we make it to class more than the guys do.”
Motivation comes in different forms. For Baskins, it’s the experience of letdown, education-wise, in her family.
“In my family, nobody has graduated yet,” she said. “Only one person went to college and she dropped out her sophomore year. I want to be the first to graduate. My family wants me to drop out like she did, but I’m not going to let it stop me. I’m getting my education.”
Alford, on the other hand, is motivated by other means. She is ready to be an independent woman and a role model for others.
“I don’t want anybody taking care of me,” she said. “I want to be able to take care of myself. I want to make a difference in somebody’s life. I want to stand on my own two feet. I don’t want people to think the world just passes us by. I want to make some kind of mark.
“Money-wise, I want to show men that I can stand by myself.”
When it comes to relationships, Alford can talk for days and nights about the relationship problems she’s witnessed or experienced. Being a, as she calls herself, “good woman,” Alford is subjected to all types of wrongdoings.
“Relationship-wise, most men, not all men, act like they don’t want a relationship,” she said. “They want a right now girl. They don’t want a companion. They are not looking for a long-term girl, but a right now girl. When it comes down to it, everyone wants their right now girl.”
There has always been talk about how the good Black women are being treated unfairly. Being that Alford considers herself one, she experiences the type of treatment everyday, from she’s not skinny enough to she’s not pretty enough.
“It seems like we’re always being treated wrong because they want a right now girl,” she explained. “It seems like boys give girls that’s nasty more respect and treat the good women like, ‘Hi’ and keep going.”
Alford thinks she knows why men treat the good women wrongly.
“For some reason, a lot of men like nasty girls,” she said. “They also like dumb girls. They need to feel wanted. A lot of men don’t like independent women. It’s like they need a woman who needs them.”
Alford doesn’t want to be that type of woman. However, she expanded on what kind of man she wanted.
“Like us, all we want is for you to be there for us,” she explained. “We just want a man to be there for us. Do the little things and call us at least twice a week. Just call us early in the morning just to say good morning. Little stuff like that makes us happy.”
Being happy is an important key to a relationship. Alford is looking for a long-term relationship, something that will make her happy. However, being that she’s independent and isn’t sexually active, she’s having a hard time finding that relationship.
“And don’t be one of those females that are independent and don’t have sex, you will be cut off completely,” she said. “You don’t get any calls or nothing. Only time you get a call from a dude is when he wants something.”
Alford also stated that some men do find good women, but it’s not what those men want.
“When a man finds a (good) woman like that, they don’t like that,” she said with exasperation. “It seems like no matter hard females like us try; we still won’t get our goals that we set with them. It seems like we get left behind at the end.
“They don’t like us because we aren’t nasty and having sex. They treat the nasty girls like they are the shit.”
Baskins has also had her problems with relationships with Black men. While she is currently in a relationship, she makes it clear that it did not happen overnight. She believes she’s found what she’s looking for in a Black man.
“I think all Black women look for a lot in Black man,” she said. “If you don’t look for a lot, a lot of Black men will not do anything with their lives. You’re going to be working hard. Black men are supposed to be strong, but we have less Black men going to college and the workforce now. You can look at how many men are in college and how many drop out.”
With a high dropout rate, many people appear to think that most Blacks are thugs and gangsters that terrorize the streets. Baskins says the misunderstanding comes from Blacks trying to be different.
“I think it’s a misconception because all Black people, we don’t care about how we look,” she said. “We think that everyone shouldn’t look the same. We should make our own type of colors and our own type of clothes. If we don’t express ourselves, then no one would know who we are. It’s a better way to determine black people from white people, and white people try to become black people.”
One reason most think that Blacks are gangsters and thugs is due to the surprising rise of hip-hop in the mid 1990’s. Within hip-hop is a genre called gangster rap, now the main form of hip-hop these days. With artists such as 50 Cent and Ja Rule, many believe that Black women are nothing but “bitches” and “hoes,” terms used in excess in gangster rap.
Baskins said that she is aware of the degrading terms, but doesn’t let them deter her.
“Personally, it doesn’t affect me,” Baskins said. “I understand that I’m not one of those bitches they are talking about. Most rappers that say that are doing it because sex sells. It sounds more hip-hop to them.
“They would rather say some stuff like that instead of calling women good names. It seems like when people talk bad about people, consumers will buy their stuff. Like when Kanye West was rapping about the good stuff, no one bought his records. Now that he’s using the bad words, he’s selling.”
However, Starr Pue, a junior Mass Communications major from Atlanta, does not listen to that form of hip-hop. She listens to what she calls “real hip-hop.”
“Common, Lupe Fiasco,” she said, naming rappers she listens to. “Hip-hop is about a lot more than the girls you have and the money you have. Most people don’t have in a lifetime $80 thousand in their bank account. Basically, when we buy those CDs from those people who rap about money and hoes, we aren’t doing anything but making them richer while they degrade women.”
Pue admits that she does listen to some gangster rap, but the words aren’t the first thing that she listens to.
“First of all, when I hear a rap song, I like to hear the beat first,” she explained. “I listen to the music first, then the words. If I like the music and don’t like the words, I stop listening to it.
“Sometimes I feel that when a person is rapping that they are talking more to those ‘other’ types of women. Others meaning hoes, bitches, just women who don’t care for themselves. If they don’t care for themselves, how is anybody else going to care for them?”
Pue and Alford both have explanations as to why “other” women act the way they do.
“A lot of girls think it’s cute,” Alford said. “I’m not going to say that I’ve never hang out with them. A lot of the attitudes come from home and how they were raised. Some were raised to think it’s cute to show their behinds and wear little clothes. Some are taught that having sex is just cute. A lot of them just get caught up in the game.”
Pue has heard many excuses, but she’s not buying them.
“Most people say that it’s self-esteem; it’s not self-esteem,” she said. “I know girls that don’t think they are the finest things walking, but they still love themselves. Some people say it’s family and how they were raised, but it’s all within the person. A person can make themselves the way they are: the way they carry themselves, the way they present themselves, and the way take care of themselves.”
One thing is for certain with Alford; men would not be able to play the same roles that women play.
“I’m tired of men degrading women,” she said. “I bet a dude couldn’t go a month in our shoes. They have to deal with periods, bloating, dealing with a guy telling them they are too fat, and so on. Then you have to worry about changing yourself to get the other guy to notice you.”
Black women struggle with many things in today’s society, from being discriminated because of gender to being degraded in songs to being mistreated in relationships to many other things. As the power of Black women rise, thanks to pioneers such as Oprah Winfrey and Condoleezza Rice, the struggle will begin to cease and depreciate in difficulty. With educational opportunities in excess, women, period, will be considered as equal as their counterparts.
