Is your child experiencing depression? Are you unsure on what to do to help your child overcome their feelings of depression? To help understand where your child’s depression may stem from and what you can do to help your child to overcome depression, I have interviewed therapist Dr. Dianna Ducote-Sabey.
Tell me a little bit about yourself.
“I am a Colorado licensed psychologist. Psychologists complete a doctoral degree (PhD or PsyD) in psychology, which includes a one-year internship the last year of training. I received my PhD from Oklahoma State University in 1999 and came to Colorado for my internship at the University of Denver Health and Counseling Center in 1997.
Two years ago I started Collaborative Journeys, a Denver counseling center offering psychological and career counseling to adolescents, adults and families. Prior to opening Collaborative Journeys I was employed as a University Psychologist and Associate Director at the University of Colorado at Boulder Psychological Services Center and most recently as Training Director and Multicultural Coordinator at the University of Denver Health and Counseling Center. I also have experience working in community mental health centers as a family and child therapist providing therapy to children and families and educating parents in how to support their children.”
Where does a child’s depression stem from?
“There are several factors that can contribute to depression in children. Some children may be genetically vulnerable to depression, although it is thought that a life stressor serves as the trigger for a depressive episode. Life experiences such as physical illness, abuse, a chaotic or violent home environment, substance abuse by self or family members and bullying by peers can cause children and adolescents to become depressed. Importantly, there are several physical conditions, for example thyroid conditions that can directly cause depressive symptoms. If you suspect your child might be depressed for a period of two weeks or longer, be sure to schedule an appointment with his pediatrician so that he can be evaluated for physical causes of depression.”
What type of impact can a child’s depression have on their overall life?
“Depression impacts children differently depending on the severity ranging from poor academic performance and a lowered overall level of life satisfaction to risky behavior (e.g. substance abuse), self-harming behavior (e.g. cutting) and even suicide. Depression is often not identified in children due to a lack of information about the disorder. Further, children and adolescents often “act out” their suffering through behavior rather than verbalize the more commonly recognized symptoms such as sadness, feelings of hopelessness and helplessness or feelings of worthlessness that characterizes depression in adults. Often depression will be explained away by adults as a stage or a normal part of childhood growing pains. As a mother myself, I understand how hard it is to accept when my child is having problems out of the ordinary. Our own denial can sometimes keep us from seeking the help our child needs.”
How can a parent help their child overcome depression?
“Most importantly a parent must overcome the natural tendency to deny the seriousness of their child’s symptoms. For example, if your normally social child starts spending hours alone in his or her room and shows little interest in spending time with friends, this could be a sign that he or she is experiencing symptoms of depression. Equally important if there is abuse, violence, substance abuse or any other family dysfunction, denial will be prominent among all family members and needs to be overcome in order to address the underlying cause of a child’s depression. In this situation, a child may be expressing a family’s distress.”
“Next it is important to educate yourself about depression including symptoms such as feelings of sadness, guilt, hopelessness and helplessness, difficulty concentrating, low energy and fatigue, complaints of physical symptoms such as aches and pains. For instance, your child might start to complain of stomach aches or seem to uncharacteristically lose confidence in herself. Even more importantly a parent can learn to identify “signs” of depression, which are symptoms that the child may not talk about, but can be observed by others. These include irritability, frequent crying, sleeping more or less than usual, decreased or increased appetite, social withdrawal and increased sensitivity. A generally easy-going child may start to break down in tears if given constructive criticism.”
“It is vital that you as a parent understand that a depressed child may experience suicidal thoughts and can be at risk for suicide. Always address these concerns directly and immediately if you suspect your child may be having thoughts of suicide. Asking a child if she is thinking of suicide will not cause her to think of this as an option if she has not previously considered suicide. A parent could say something like, “Sometimes kids feel so sad that they may wish they weren’t here anymore or think about hurting themselves, have you had thoughts like that?” Be steady and matter of fact when asking these questions so that your child has confidence that you can handle an affirmative answer. Asking also gives your child the permission to talk about something that he may have felt unable to talk about.”
Children do not always verbalize suicidal thoughts or plans, however there are signs a parent can identify that indicate a child is at risk. The following are signs that your child may be experiencing suicidal thoughts: severe depression, social isolation, talk of suicide, hopelessness and helplessness, increased acting-out or risky behavior, substance abuse, focusing on morbid or dark themes, talking about death or dying or giving away his possessions.
“If you suspect your child is seriously thinking of suicide do not leave her alone or unsupervised and get her to a physician or mental health professional immediately. After-hours and on weekends, you can take your child to the emergency room of the nearest hospital. If you are unable to transport your child and are not sure that you can keep her safe, call 911 and request an ambulance to transport her to the emergency room.”
What type of professional help is available for a child who is experiencing depression?
“Depression is treatable and a child can make a complete recovery with the proper treatment. The treatment of choice for mild to moderate depression is psychotherapy. A good place to start is with your pediatrician, who may know of some therapists they can recommend. Another possible source of referrals is your child’s school counselor. If there is a university in your community, they often have names of therapists they can recommend.”
“If a child is moderately to severely depressed, he or she may need a combination of psychotherapy and medication. Often, pediatricians will prescribe medications for depression and other mental health issues. Personally, I would strongly suggest a parent seek out a psychiatrist, who is a medical physician specifically trained in mental health disorders. Medications for mental health disorders have become increasingly commonplace, but they are not without risks and should not be prescribed unless absolutely necessary.”
“Finally, communicate a sense of belonging and hope to your child. Depression is not a character flaw or weakness of willpower; it is an illness that is experienced by otherwise “normal” people. Help your child to understand this and let her know that she can talk with you about it and that it can be treated successfully. Let her know she is not alone and that you will help her get the treatment and support that she needs to recover.”
You can learn more about childhood depression online at http://www.medicinenet.com/ or at http://www.webmd.com/.”
Thank you Dr. Ducote-Sabey for doing the interview on how a parent can help their child overcome depression. For more information about Dr. Ducote-Sabey or her work check out her website at http://www.collaborative-journeys.com/.
Recommended Readings:
Signs Your Tenn is Using Drugs
Disciplining a Rebellious Teen
Teen Suicide
