Like thousands of people all over the world I have become very hooked on Fantasy sports. I began to play a few years ago, starting with Fantasy Baseball, I then added to that by playing Fantasy Basketball. I didn’t like basketball as much for some reason and dropped it. Not long after that my sister asked me if I wanted to play Fantasy Football with her husband and his brothers, so I have since played with them every season. This year I did something different though.
When I played Fantasy Basketball, Baseball, and Football I had a pretty good idea what I was doing. I’ve watched all those sports and have knowledge of them. This year my sister asked me if I had any interest in playing Fantasy Hockey. I said sure even though I know nothing about hockey. I’ve never seen an entire hockey game in my life; I’ve never even seen half a hockey game. The only hockey I’ve ever seen is highlights on Sportscenter.
Going into the Fantasy Hockey draft I could only name a few players and didn’t look at a single Fantasy Hockey website or Fantasy Hockey magazine. I went into my Fantasy Hockey draft completely blind. I chose my team, set my lineups for the entire season and just left my Fantasy Hockey team how it was the entire season. My Fantasy Hockey team then proceeded to be in first place after the first week and stayed in first place until about week 20. My Fantasy Hockey team then dropped to second place and stayed there the rest of the season.
My Fantasy Hockey got the two seed in the playoffs and stormed its way through the playoffs including a 9 – 4 win in the Finals against the first place team. In the Finals my Fantasy Hockey team had 32 goals and 49 assists on its way to an 81 to 63 lead in points and a +33 compared to the opponent’s +4.
So I not only won, but dominated my Fantasy Hockey league, a guy who has never even watched an Ice Hockey game before, a guy who has never won his Fantasy Baseball, Fantasy Basketball, or Fantasy Football leagues, even though he does know something about those sports. I like to call it the Miracle on Ice 2. So now, since I’m a Fantasy Hockey expert I will reveal to you how I drafted my miracle team.
Step One: Pick the best players
I know this seems like a pretty simple idea, but it’s actually genius. Most Fantasy Hockey owners will over think during the draft. They’ll think this guy isn’t going to be good because he is 32 years old, they’ll think that guy over there isn’t going to play well because he’s left handed and that guy over there? Don’t pick him, his hair is too long.
Ok so I’m exaggerating a little bit. The point is most people are so busy projecting what a player will do next year that they complete ignore what a player did previous years and really that is the more meaningful gauge of how good someone is. So pick the players that are ranked the highest to start with, they are the ones that have proven then are good.
Step Two: Pick the Younger Guys
After all the best players, mostly offensive guys, were gone I was left with a bunch of scrubs, none of who looked particularly better than anybody else. They pretty much had about the same stats as everyone else left. So I selected the youngest guys. Why? Hockey is a very physical sport and even though some of those guys are tough and will play a long time, the older guys are obviously more beat up than the young guys. If you have two guys who have similar stats and one is 22 and one is 30, I just like the chances of the 22 year old to improve while the 30 year old is probably declining.
Step Three: Pick Cool Names
Seriously, why not? Sometimes it is the silliest way of choosing people that works. Some people correctly predict the Final Four just by picking the team with the mascot that would beat the other mascot or which team has the better uniform. So I selected players that had names I liked and it worked.
In the fifteenth round of my Fantasy Hockey draft I selected Sheldon Souray because I liked his name, he finished 53 spots higher than his offseason rank. Souray finished the season ranked 30th and I selected him 174th in the draft. In the sixteenth round of my Fantasy Hockey draft I selected Jay Bouwmeester because I liked his name, he finished 28 spots higher than his offseason rank. In the 18th round of my Fantasy Hockey draft I chose Jozef Stumpel because of his name and he finished 22 spots higher than his offseason rank and I chose Doug Weight with the 222nd pick overall because of his name and he finished the season ranked 97th. Let’s face it, ice hockey is just all about guys with cool names doing well; always take the guys with cool names in Fantasy Hockey.
So that’s it, that’s all you need to know to win your Fantasy Hockey team. Pick the best player, then the youngest players and then the players with the coolest names and you’ll be raising a Fantasy Hockey trophy some day.
