A majority of women dislike watching films in which women get naked with their significant others, because it can incite jealousy and disgust. There are some scenes, however, that can make some couples watching films together a little more uncomfortable. Here are some of the nude scenes in films that a man should probably not watch with his girlfriend, wife, lover, planned one-night stand, or whatever (because it will probably result in no sex for him):
Eyes Wide Shut
Critics hated Stanley Kubrick’s final work when it premiered in theaters. The opening sequence of Nicole Kidman dropping her dress to reveal her naked butt quieted theater audiences immediately. There were multiple scenes in this film that would cause a woman to stare at her date’s face to see how he was reacting, like Tom Cruise checking out a topless patient, when there was no apparent need for her to be topless, or focusing on a nude Nicole Kidman getting dressed. The scene that made women hate this film the most, however, would have to be the sadistic sex cult scene. Not only is Tom Cruise planning on cheating on his wife with one of the women there, there is an abundance of female nudity throughout the scene. When the extremely aesthetically pleasing women standing in a circle around the master character drop their robes to reveal their perfect bodies, it’s enough to make any man drool and any woman cringe. If you’re a woman and you can handle it, it is a great film.
Last Tango in Paris
Then nineteen-year old Maria Schneider would later state that she regretted doing this film, due to an anal sex scene that she took part in. She is nude in a great deal of it, and she has very large, natural breasts. Her character is extremely sexual, and the film has plenty of sex scenes. Perhaps women wouldn’t feel quite as badly about this film today, because she has a lot of pubic hair, a look which is definitely not in fashion with women or men now. The film is one of Bertolucci’s greatest, and it wouldn’t be the same without all of the provocative sex scenes.
Dangerous Liaisons
Uma Thurman has become a beloved Hollywood actress, and she probably won’t be doing any nude scenes again anytime soon, but in 1988 she created a bit of a controversy by starring in this film. She appears topless in a scene, and it seems she was probably 17 when they shot the scene (she turned eighteen during filming). Regardless of her age, Uma is breathtaking, and there’s no way a man can’t become entranced by looking at her.
Christina Ricci appears topless more than a few times in this crazy film. Her portrayal of a poor, white-trash nymphomaniac should have gotten her nominated for an Oscar. She’s an extremely sexual character in the film, and any guy who’s into bondage will love seeing her chained to a radiator (to prevent her from going out and having sex). But the scene that will really get the guys watching in trouble is the scene where she’s playing football wearing nothing up top but football pads. Combining sports and girls will get the guys every time.
Mulholland Dr.
This film can be difficult to follow, as far as the storyline goes. It’s David Lynch at his best: a film that’s disjointed, weird, and sometimes even frightening, but it’s great. It contains one of the best lesbian love-making scenes ever done with actresses Naomi Watts and Laura Elena Harring. The steamy scene contains plenty of female nudity, and it would probably be difficult for a male to watch this film with a female without getting a little excited. So if you want to watch this film and have sex afterwards, good luck, because your lady will probably ask you if your desire for lovemaking has something to do with recently watching this film, and that could lead to a rather ugly discussion.
Short Cuts
There is a scene in this film that will probably make a man laugh, but a woman cringe. Women seem to really like the actress Julianne Moore. Perhaps that’s because all of her recent films have contained no nude scenes (Women seem to like actresses more who don’t do nude scenes.) But in this film, she has a very memorable semi-nude scene. Her character and her character’s husband are having a very serious conversation about a tryst she had with another man, when she spills wine on her skirt. As they are yelling at one another, she takes her skirt off. She continues on with their conversation, but her husband, Matthew Modine, makes the observation, “You’re not wearing any panties!” It’s a funny scene, but women probably would be a bit taken aback by it, and probably wouldn’t be laughing as much as the male audience would.
Gia
This film is the worst on this list, artistically speaking, but as far as the nude scenes go, it will probably be the favorite of the male audience. Why? Angelina Jolie plays a model who is into other women, and she gets naked in the film (in case you missed the Family Guy Star Wars special that made sure to point this out). Women seem to like Angelina well enough now, since she’s adopted a whole nation, but she was extremely hated when she “stole” Brad Pitt from Jennifer Aniston and seemed to be more than a little crazy. She’s still considered by many to be one of the sexiest women alive still, and no woman is going to want to sit with her man and watch a very sexual, young Angelina Jolie press her nude body up a chain link fence.
So if you’re a guy looking for a film with a few good nude scenes to enjoy by yourself, then you may want to watch these films. But if you are in a relationship with a conservative or ultra-insecure woman, it’s not a good idea to watch any of these films with her. It could lead to an argument and a bunch of questions you don’t want to answer, mostly having to with how your woman stacks up against the actresses in the film. If you’re looking for an interesting way to instigate a break-up, however…
