Weddings cost everyone involved money, including those invited to the happy event. Gifts must be purchased, wrapped and presented to the happy couple, but does every event leading up to the big day require a gift? The pre-wedding showers, dinners and parties may or may not require attendees bring a token of their love for the couple. The wedding and reception gifts on the day of the big event, and what about destination weddings, are invitees expected to purchase a wedding gift on top of paying their own travel expenses?
No one wants to appear cheap or rude, but in this economy everyone has to watch their budgets and wedding gift giving can take a huge bite out of a budget. Here are some do’s and don’ts for wedding gift giving that will help stretch the budget by giving gifts at the appropriate times.
The Engagement Party
The engagement party’s primary function is to formally announce the couple’s engagement to family and friends. Generally, gifts are optional and the invitations for engagements parties often include a note stating that no gifts are expected, but there are exceptions. When in doubt, ask the host of the engagement party or give a token gift.
This is definitely a gift giving occasion. If you are invited to more than one wedding shower for the same couple, it is perfectly acceptable to give a gift at only one of the showers. If you have been invited to the wedding also, a wedding gift is expected in addition to the wedding shower gift.
Neither of these are gift giving occasions. Nothing is expected by the bride and groom for these parties except a good time with choice friends and family.
If you have been invited to attend the wedding ceremony, a gift is expected even if you are unable to attend the ceremony. When not attending the wedding, a congratulatory card with or without an enclosed check is acceptable. Bring or send a gift to the wedding venue or to a pre-arranged gift drop-off location on the day of the big event. If you are only invited to the reception, a wedding gift is not expected.
Destination Wedding Gift
Even when you pay to travel to an exotic location for a destination wedding, a wedding gift is still expected for the bride and groom. The wedding gift doesn’t have to cost as much as you might have paid had the wedding been conducted locally, so consider a token wedding gift or congratulatory card for a destination wedding.
