Maxed out all the college prep classes available and aced the SATs, and it finally paid off. Today is moving day. Yes, you are moving into the dorm. Since you are the motivated, do-the-research type, you attended all the required meetings before your move-in date. And, as advised, you got to know those living in the same dorm building as you. Good for you! But, do you know what etiquette you should use with your dorm mate to make this transition into college life successful–or at least less stressful? The following rules and suggestions just might make the grade.
Preemptive Strikes
Learning to live with your dorm mate is a valuable life experience. We learn how to create relationships with a total stranger, which is what you will need to do in your work life. To build and maintain this relationship, begin with creating and agreeing to the “rules of your dorm room”.
Suggestions
- Sharing of items, such as microwaves, televisions, and refrigerators. Some universities only allow one of each per room — negotiate sharing first thing.
- Set neatness and noise policy — often the biggest problems between dormies.
- Bedtimes? Agree upon a time or at least how to minimize waking each other up if arriving late.
- Chores? Set up a list and schedule.
- Discuss and agree upon decorating.
- Set nudity and overnight visitor boundaries.
- Most colleges prohibit alcohol, smoking, and drug use; discuss it and be firm.
- Set boundaries and rules about shared spaces and storage.
- If sharing a bathroom, set time limits on shower use.
- Sharing personal property preferences.
- Adhere to all rules!
Revisit these rules often to make sure you’re both on the same page.
Be Kind and Courteous
Thankfully, you followed the sage advice to meet as many people as possible in your dorm hall/building before school began. So, when issues arise, such as noise, it will be easier to request quiet as you study. Of course, politeness goes a long way. Even if stressed about upcoming finals, make your requests with a smile. And, of course, don’t be the person who causes others to invest in ear plugs.
Suggested Etiquette
- Ask how your dorm mate wishes to arrange his/her furniture before arranging yours.
- Don’t borrow anything without permission, including food, towels, and toiletries.
- Clean up after yourself, including daily garbage.
- Do your laundry promptly! It gets smelly quickly.
- Smells include you! Bathe every day.
- Treat all furniture as if it is priceless.
- Don’t leave valuables in the open–your roomie shouldn’t be responsible for them.
- Don’t abuse your roommate’s patience by inviting overnight guests too often or for too many hours.
- Carry and store toiletries in a tote to shared bathrooms so as not to take up too much space.
- Always ask yourself if your behavior will affect others in a negative manner. Would I appreciate it if someone else did that at 4 am?
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