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Deadly Beauty: Self Image and Self Esteem in the United States and Elsewhere

Beauty is such a relative word. Beauty is relative to one’s perception. Beauty is relative to one’s ability to perceive. Beauty is relative to one’s psyche. Beauty is relative to one’s beliefs.

Women of today are slowly, but surely, being murdered by Beauty.

How can this be, you may ask yourself. How can Beauty murder anyone? Beauty is not alive. Beauty is not cognizant. Beauty is not evil. You ponder the statement and then quietly ask… Is it?

Beauty in itself is neither evil nor cognizant. Beauty does not walk, talk, scheme and plan. Beauty is, however, something that we humans have managed to mold into a razor-sharp weapon dripping with deadly poison. Whispers of vicious, poisonous barbs are heard all over the world, every hour of every day.

“She’s too fat.”
“She’s too thin.”
“My lips aren’t plump enough.”
“Her eyes are too close together.”
“Her teeth aren’t straight or white enough.”
“Her nose is too tiny.”
“Her nose is too long.”
“My cheeks aren’t high enough.”
“Her breasts are too small.”
“Her breasts are too large.”
“My legs are too short.”
“Her hair is too thin.”
“Her hair is too curly.”
“My eyes are too large.”
“Her butt is too big.”
“She has no butt.”
“She’s too old.”
“She has too many wrinkles.”
“She was such a beauty when she was younger, thinner.”
“I hate the way I look.”
“I’m so ugly.”

I could go on and on, but why? We woman have heard far too many of these poisonous barbs throughout our lives and what is worse is that we have started saying them to ourselves. You know what I’m talking about. You have experienced the pain of thoughtless words tossed with deadly accuracy. You have been sliced to ribbons, emotionally, with sharp words said as if they were meant to help rather than slay. You have looked into the mirror and seen some grotesque monster looking back at you. You have whispered and even shouted at yourself that you are “ugly”, “disgusting” and “nothing like those models on T.V.”

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When did you start to hate yourself? Was it as a teenager? Perhaps it didn’t hit you until much later when you turned 45 and realized that your body and face had changed. On the other hand, maybe you are a young girl of only seven or eight who has decided that you don’t measure up to the “perfect” girls you see on your favorite television show.

Females, both younger and older, are slowly, but surely, being murdered by Beauty.

Standing over the casket of a young teenaged girl who took her life after finally giving in to the voices in her head, on the television, in the magazine and in the halls of her school, that told her she was ugly or fat or both, you wonder to yourself. Did beauty kill her too? If Beauty had a form and shape, would it be dressed all in black and carrying a sickle like Death? Would Beauty in this all too recognizable form stalk our girls and women from the moment they were born until the day that they died? It might. I think it does.

We have no one to blame but ourselves. Yes, you heard me right. We have no one to blame but ourselves. This is not something we can foist on someone else. This is something that we, as a society, have done to ourselves!

When did we become such a vain society? When did we decide that our schoolchildren needed to have a BMI report card sent home with them every month? When did we decide that baby fat deserved a rigid diet rather than a loving kiss on the cheek? When did we decide that every single woman in the world must look exactly the same, weigh exactly the same and be shaped exactly the same?

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Because we have done this inexplicable thing, we have created this murderous Beauty and set it free to wreak havoc upon every person on this planet. Not even males are safe from Beauty. There is a time between ages seven and thirty where men are most vulnerable, in my opinion. It is during this time that Beauty stalks them as well as women. Young boys are teased because they wear glasses, have large ears, large noses or pimples. This is just a phase that men go through, that we all go through, yet they are teased and hounded mercilessly by Beauty in it’s long, black mourning gown carrying it’s poisonous bladed sickle.

Beauty is ready to harvest poor souls that dare to be human. Are we not all human? What is this need for perfection? Who is to define this perfect beauty? We are all so very different. There can never be one measure of beauty that applies to all and is, as well, fair. Yet we beat one another with the Beauty bat every single day! Give over already! Wake up!

Beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder. This is not some asinine statement. This is pure and simple Truth. We must stop turning Beauty into a sharp, poisonous weapon that we swing at one another until there is no one left. It is time for Beauty to take off its black robes and lower its sickle to the ground. It is time for Beauty to walk, carefree, through our lives blessing every one of us with its uniqueness.

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It is time for all of us to delve much more deeply within ourselves until we finally understand that beauty is unique and can never be just one standard by which to measure all peoples. It is time we look ourselves in the mirror and say, “I love you” and “I’m beautiful”. It is time that we look one another in the face and say “I love you” and “You are beautiful.” It is time, my fellow humans, to allow beauty to be the gift it was meant to be and not the weapon we have made of it.

For an interesting view on our distortion of beauty, please click on this sentence to be carried to a very eye-opening movie made by Dove.

After you watch the movie, please click on this link for Self-Esteem Solutions presented, again, by Dove. You will also find many other helpful areas on this website.