Back-to-School Questions to Ask Your Kids
It seems the natural thing to do, when talking to a young person during the end of summer, to ask if they are ready for school to start. The answer seems to come just as naturally in the form of an ear piercing, “NNNNOOOO WWWWWAAAAYYYY!!!!
The same scenario plays out with teachers, too. Same question, same answer. Of course there are exceptions to everything. Some students and teachers can’t wait to get back into the swing of things. The majority of folks, however, think summer needs to be a couple hundred days longer.
So before your life as a parent turns into a whirlwind of early morning carpools, busy afternoon homework sessions, and projects, projects, projects, savor those last lazy moments with your kids. While you are lying on the grass making shapes out of the clouds with them, ask your kids a question or two. That’s right, make them think! Warm up their brains, and learn a thing or two about your kids while you’re at it.
Before you burn the following questions into your brain or write them on the palm of your hand, there are a couple of things you need to keep front and center in you mind.
First of all, this is not the time for judgment. No right or wrong answers here, no keeping score. Just listening, learning, and sharing. If something comes up that bothers you, let it go if you can. If it is something more serious, come back to the problem later when you’ve had some time to think about the best way to address it. Remember, the point is to get you kids talking so you can get a clearer picture of their world. If any scolding or punishment is involved, you’re pretty much holding a one way ticket out of their world for quite some time.
Second, a long silence is OK. Whatever you do, don’t jump in with a possible answer for you kids. Let them think! If you haven’t heard a peep after five minutes or so, ask the question again. If you child is still mum, either let it go or tell them how you would answer the question for yourself.
That brings us to the next tip. After listening to your child’s answers, offer your own answer from your perspective. If you are sharing about your life too, if becomes a dialog, not an interrogation. Nobody likes to be interrogated. And if you do not understand your child’s answer, ask them to clarify, but be sure to tread lightly when you do.
If you have more than one child, you may get very different answers one-on-one than with everyone all together. That is neither good nor bad, just something to keep in mind. You may decide to ask each child a couple of the questions individually, then pose the same questions at the dinner table and open things up for a family discussion.
Another option would be to create a back-to-school book that could be revisited each year before school starts. Each child could have their own book where they could record their answers each year and see how they’ve changed. Or you could create a family book, with each child answering the same question on the same page. Chose whatever works best for you and your family.
All right! On to the questions, in no particular order.
1. What was your favorite thing about school last year?
2. What are you looking forward to the most this year?
3. What things are you hoping will happen this year?
4. What things are you hoping will not happen this year?
5. What things are you hoping you will learn about this year?
6. What are you hoping you will learn how to do this year?
7. What are you hoping you will get better at this year?
8. What are you dreading about the first day of school?
9. What did you like about your teacher last year?
10. What didn’t you like about your teacher last year?
11. What do you think would have made him/her a better teacher?
12. What makes a good teacher?
13. What makes a bad teacher?
14. What was the best thing you did at recess last year?
15. What things do you think you will do at recess this year?
16. If you could take anything, absolutely anything, for lunch, what would you take?
17. Do you like to sit in the front or back of the classroom?
18. Do you like group projects?
19. What is the first thing you think of when you think of school?
20. What is your best memory of all your time in school?
21. What is your worst memory of all your time in school?
22. What do you hope your teacher will be like this year?
23. If you never had to go to school again, what would you do with all that time?
24. What subject do you wish you could be an expert in without ever having to study?
25. What would make school more enjoyable?
26. What would make school worse?
27. Describe the worst school day possible.
28. If you could only study one subject all day, every day, what would you pick?
29. What would happen in a perfect school day?
30. If you could change one thing about the school day, what would it be?
31. Why do you think school ends at 3:00?
32. Do you know who will be in your class this year?
33. Who do you hope will be in your class this year?
34. Who do you hope will not be in you class this year?
35. Have you ever been blamed for something you didn’t do at school?
36. Have you ever had to eat your lunch alone?
37. Do many kids play alone at recess?
38. Tell me one thing you know your teacher will really like about you.
39. What makes you want to be one person’s friend, but not another?
40. Has anyone ever called you a bad name at school?
41. Has anyone ever teased you at school? Why?
42. How many kids do you know at school who are younger than you are?
43. How many do you know that are older than you are?
44. Do you like being the age you are now, or do you wish you could be younger or older?
45. Do any kids in your class like to brag about their grades or belongings?
46. Have you ever been tempted to brag about grades or belongings?
47. Why do you think those kids like to brag?
48. Do you think you are a good friend?
49. Pretend it’s the end of the first day of school and you can read your teacher’s mind.
What do you think he/she is thinking about you?
50. Pretend there is a new kid in your class and you can read her mind.
What do you think she is thinking about you?
51. If everyone at school could read your mind, do you think you would have fewer friends?
52. What do you think school was like 100 years ago?
53. Do you think school was better or worse 100 years ago than it is today?
54. How would your life change if school was just you and your computer, no classroom, live teacher or live classmates?
If you think of any other questions, be sure to write them down so you can revisit them next year. Hopefully, you have just discovered a new family tradition. Have fun with it, and have a great school year!
