It can be very hard to find a good list of humorous movie quotes; here are a few of my personal favorites:
20. Bernie: “Can you help me? I have lost my sense of direction.” Kermit: “Have you tried Hare Krishna?” Bernie the Agent and Kermit the Frog in The Muppet Movie
19. “Here comes tall, dark, and cyanide.” Hot Lips Barton in The Road to Rio
18. “How would you like to feel the way she looks?” Otis B. Driftwood in A Night at the Opera
17. George: “Mary, is it a boy or a girl?” Mary: “Um-hum!” George and Mary Bailey in It’s a Wonderful Life
16. Kermit: “We’re going to have to catch those thieves red handed.” Beauregard: “What color are their hands now?” Kermit the Frog and Beauregard in The Great Muppet Capper
15. I really am a horse doctor. But, marry me and I promise never to look at another horse again.” Dr. Hugo Z. Hackenbush in A Day at the Races
14. “There’s no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you’ll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?” Elaine Dickinson in Airplane!
13. “You know, you haven’t stopped talking since I came here. You must have been vaccinated with a phonograph needle.” Rufus T. Firefly in Duck Soup
12. Pippen: “I feel like I’m back at the Green Dragon after a hard day’s work.” Merry: “Only you’ve never done a hard day’s work!” Pippin and Merry in The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King
11. Pseudolus: “She has the plague.” Lycus: “Is it contagious?” Pseudolus: “Have you ever seen a plague that wasn’t?” Pseudolus and Lycus in A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum
10. For a woman who has been dead for thirty years she looked very good.” Tevye in Fiddler on the Roof
9. “It won’t kill you. It just causes muscular convulsions and then a coma.” Princess Lala in The Road to Bali
8. Jonathan: “Now she’s dead!” Van Helsing: “No.” Jonathan: “She’s alive?” Van Helsing: “She is Nosferatu.” Jonathan: “She’s Italian?” Jonathan Harker and Dr. Abraham van Helsing in Dracula: Dead and Loving it
7. Children of the night…shut up!” Count Vladimir Dracula in Love at First Bite
6. Crapgame: “Hey! I found one (a landmine)!” Big Joe: “What kind is it?” Crapgame: “The kind that blows up! How the Hell do I know what kind it is?” SSgt. Crapgame and MSgt. Big Joe in Kelly’s Heroes
5. Reporter: “How did you find America?” John: “Turned left at Greenland.” Reporter and John in A Hard Day’s Night
4.”One morning I shot an elephant in my pajamas. How he got in my pajamas I don’t know.” Captain Geoffrey T. Spaulding in Animal Crackers
3. “All me life flashed before me eyes…it was really boring!” Babs in Chicken Run
2. Striker: “Surely, you can’t be serious!” Rumack: “I am serious…and don’t call me Shirley.” Ted Striker and Dr. Rumack in Airplane!
1. “Gentlemen, you can’t fight in here, this is the war room!” President Merkin Mufflery in Dr. Strangelove or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb
Source: http://www.imdb.com/
