Kids are active – that’s just fact. But some parents are blessed with that one child who seems to want to destroy everything in sight and is not happy until he has accomplished the task. Having threatened the child, promised him treats, grounded him and even repossessed his favorite possessions, the child will still act badly and be destructive. Don’t worry so much, though. There could be a logical explanation for such a child’s behavior.
We’ve all had it drummed into our heads that too much sugar or caffeine can give a child too much energy. Most of us know the basic facts about nutrition, exercise and topics like moderation. But not every child’s destructive behavior is because his nutritional needs aren’t being met.
And, too, there’s always the consideration that a child could have medical problems, such as thyroid issues. After discounting dietary and medical problems, your child could be facing some inner struggles that you may be completely unaware of – and so is he.
Some kids love reading, some enjoy crafts, others like going outside to jump and run. But no matter what children love to do in their spare time their minds are always thinking and pondering. This poses a problem for the destructive child since he may be the type that ponders over how things work in the world.
Children that have an inborn trait of constantly wondering how things are assembled, how they work, what component causes which reaction, and generally how most things operate, are more likely to be seen as “destructive”. Their nagging curiosity can cause them to disassemble – even rip things apart – so that they can see what’s on the inside, how things work or how they look.
Although small kids can’t explain why they have the destructive behavior there are a few signs which point to this type of personality: can’t sit still, always picking things up and examining them, will taste things beyond the age where children naturally put things in their mouths, will pick at things like labels, cloth, buttons or zippers, fingernails, paint and such.
The “destructive” kid can be helped in many ways. He has a natural curiosity that needs to be met and if you help him, he’ll quit tearing up your stuff! Get him things that he can make, like kits where he can see how things are put together. Allow him to disassemble even if it means he can’t put it back together again. Other great ideas include magnet sets, tinker toys, models, easy woodworking sets, cards and dice, and other items. Look around your local department store for things that can be assembled, disassembled, torn, bent or folded, hammered, or strung. These kids love keeping busy with their hands and minds.
Offer your child things before you throw them away. If it’s something he can’t get hurt on, see if he wants it to tear apart. Cereal and other boxes, empty spice jars, empty squeeze bottles (such as water bottles), and similar items. The “destructive” kid loves to tear apart boxes, rip off labels, pry open tabs and such, so let him have at it. For every cardboard box you let him tear to pieces you save yourself a piece of your furniture or one of their expensive toys.
Take the child outdoors, camping, hiking, or biking. Exploring the great outdoors is a fabulous way to get your child interested in all sorts of new things. Let him collect a bag of leaves, rocks, wood chips, and other interesting things to take home. Let him throw rocks at a safe location, break tree limbs, or tear apart an empty fallen bird’s nest. He’ll find plenty to occupy his mind, and when he gets home, he’ll be too tired to destroy anything else.
Although some destructive kids need counseling, because there are other issues at hand, other kids simply have a natural curiosity that prompts them to constantly discover new things. Don’t punish the child – get him busy with a project where he can tear things up but really do no damage.
Reference:
- Read more about destructive kids
