Human nature is rarely taken into account when the experts pontificate about the ideal workplace environment. In a Utopian world, our coworkers would always give us credit, our bosses would be on time with yearly raises and the office would include coffee pots on every corner. In reality, however, few office environments are perfect, and it can be even worse when your boss plays favorites.
Remember that kid in high school who all the teachers liked? He got great grades, played every sport, was on time for class and never failed a test. You probably hated that kid (unless you were that kid) and the same is true for the office. They say that no one likes an over-achiever, but that is the employee with whom your boss plays favorites.
As with everything, there are two sides to this coin. On the one side (we’ll call it tails), your boss plays favorites with someone else. You always get left behind on the annual reviews and the good projects, and you feel undervalued despite your efforts. In this case, you are forced to deal not only with professional frustration, but also a personal feeling of disappointment.
When your boss plays favorites and you aren’t the Chosen One, you have a limited number of options. The first is to step up your game and emulate the employee for whom your boss carries a torch. Be earlier to meetings, produce better results and go above and beyond the call of duty. This in no way guarantees that your boss will stop playing favorites or notice you more, but it’s a good start.
Your other two options are less attractive. First, you could always quit and find another job in which you are more appreciated. Second, there is always the option of confronting your boss about the situation, which can be highly embarrassing.
The other side of the coin (we’ll call it heads) is that your boss plays favorites with you sitting in the hot seat. Your boss idealizes you and feels that you can do no wrong. This might seem like a non-issue – in fact, it might be downright appealing at first – but in the end this is just as uncomfortable as the tails side of things.
First, your coworkers are naturally going to resent you because your boss plays favorites. You’re always chosen for the great tasks and you never get called in for a tongue-lashing. Secondly, if your boss is constantly lavishing you with praise, you might start to feel as though the situation has become inappropriate.
Regardless of the situation you’re in, it’s important to do what’s best for your career. If your job is hindered because your boss plays favorites, it might be time to seek out another form of employment. Talking to your boss in either situation can cause more harm than good and you’re probably going to be stuck in an uncomfortable situation regardless.
