Spinal Fusion Surgery can be very stressful, not only on the patient but on their loved ones. Unless you have gone through it before or have known someone who has gone through a Fusion surgery, you basically have no idea what to expect or what to do. There is little to no information out there for the loved ones of these individuals. My husband was hurt at work at 23 years of age and recently went under the knife, having a Spinal Fusion. Through my own personal experience, I will share what I have learned to help the one you love after a Spinal Fusion Surgery.
Reassurance
After surgery your loved one will be in tremendous pain. Understand that they are nearly helpless. And because of this helplessness they can be really down on themselves or even become depressed. Reassure them that things will be fine and that they will be back to normal in no time. It’s a very long road to recovery and they will need to be just as mentally strong as physically. Some people may need constant reassurance, others not so much. Either way the more you give the better it will make them feel.
Be Understanding
Once you are home and you have no nurses you will start to realize how hard things are going to be, not only for the individual who had surgery but for you. You may be asked to do things several times in a day. Small things that we take for granted that someone with a Spinal Fusion cannot do. If for example your husband or wife wants something and you are busy, put what you have down and help them. Although you have important things to do yourself, keeping up with the house, pets or possibly children like in my situation; it’s important to let the person know that they have not been forgotten and that they are not a burden.
Be Positive
Because of the amount of pain your loved one will be in, it’s possible that they could say things they don’t mean or be angry. Don’t take these things personally, you have to be positive and put yourself in their shoes. Imagine the most pain you have ever been in and times that by ten. Try to stay optimistic not just for your loved one but for yourself.
Think Ahead
Think of a B.L.T. sandwich for a moment and remember this. Your loved one will not be able to Bend, Lift or Twist. So simple things like brushing their teeth, getting a drink from the fridge or even putting on clothes can be a task. Leave a cup on the bathroom sink so that when your loved one brushes his or her teeth the spit can go into the cup. Because they can’t bend the spit would fly all over them and the counter. Leave all beverages and snacks at the top of the fridge. Again they cannot bend down to pick up something from the bottom of the fridge. Lay clothes out on top of the dresser and ask if they need assistance.
Give Their Independence Back
Although being waiting on hand and foot may sound appealing, it can be very degrading. Imagine not being able to tie your shoes, put on your pants or in some cases going to the bathroom by yourself. Help them be as independent as possible without over doing anything. For example if you are putting on their pants for them put the pants on up to their knees and allow them to do the rest. If dinner is ready instead of bringing their plate to them ask them if they want to make their plate. If they do have everything on the counter they would need or want.
Undoubtably the next four to six months after surgery will be hard on everyone. This may even be the hardest time in your lives. There will be good and bad days. But time will eventually heal all wounds. Knowing what you can expect and what you can do to help can make all the difference in the world.
