It is normal tradition to hold your rehearsal dinner on the day prior to your wedding. That’s when the festivities really begin. The rehearsal dinner is a great way to get both sides of the family involved and spending time together, while it also serves as an opportunity to practice for one of the biggest days of your life. The problem is most people spend too much time chatting and having a great time instead of learning where they need to be during the ceremony. The rehearsal should be fun, but at the same time, taken very seriously. Here are a few tips to conducting your rehearsal the right way:
Be the leader.
You need to make sure people show up on time and prepared to learn the routine, whether you tell them yourself or your wedding coordinator sets everything up. Most of the wedding party will want some sort of run through for the full program, especially the bride and groom. I want you to think about the purpose of a rehearsal dinner for a second. The bride and groom have put in months and months worth of work preparing for this and making arrangements for this single day. Those arrangements are for this single event, so why not take the time to make sure the actual ceremony is perfect. Otherwise, you’ve wasted all those months if you forget where to stand, etc. The parties involved in the rehearsal are the bride and groom, their parents, the wedding party, and even the musicians that are participating in the event. From the very beginning, make sure everyone knows that they’ll have fun later that night at the dinner, but for now they need to concentrate and listen. Many times you’ll find yourself being like the teacher of a bunch of children, having to constantly remind them to hush and listen. The official or wedding coordinator, of the ceremony will give everyone their cues for the next day, including telling them where they stand, who needs to be escorted, and the order to leave. Knowing where to stand and what to do will make everyone much less nervous the next day when the wedding begins.
Inform everyone.
Although formal engraved invitations are not required for the wedding rehearsal and dinner, I believe that it is proper etiquette to send out some sort of card or letter stating the date, time, and location of the rehearsal. People have many things going on in life, and I’m sure they will appreciate the reminder. I would also provide directions or a map to the rehearsal so that your wedding party coming from out-of-town will not have a difficult time trying to find it. It’s also best to follow up the letter or card with a phone call to ensure they got it and are planning to go. Most of the time, the rehearsal is held at the same site as the wedding. This is also helpful for children that will be involved in the wedding because they become familiar with the surroundings. If the rehearsal is at a place that is different from the wedding, be sure to provide different directions to the wedding party.
Practice everything.
The stressful thing about weddings is that you never know what could go wrong. You’ve got this elaborate event in a room filled with people, and so many things must fall in line in order for it to be a success. Always plan for the unexpected. For instance, let me tell you a story about my brother. When he got married, he was planning on using his big black Labrador in the wedding. His dog, or Baxter as we call him, is very well behaved and my brother thought it’d be a cute idea that Baxter be one of the groomsmen and walks down the aisle with us. My brother thought by simply calling his name during the ceremony that he would come down the aisle and stand next to him. However, we didn’t practice that routine in the rehearsal. In fact, Baxter wasn’t even there. During the wedding, when it was time for Baxter to trot out he instead took of running and required my uncle to chase him down. This is an example to always practice every aspect of your wedding, whether it involves pets, children, or a hardheaded uncle.
The rehearsal dinner.
Everyone loves the rehearsal dinner. The rehearsal dinner is perhaps one of the most exciting parts of getting married. Your entire wedding party is in such a great mood because they’ve just finished practicing, and they’re looking forward to the great company and delicious food. The rehearsal dinner serves as a celebration dinner, where the bride and groom are the center of attention. This dinner is typically held at a less-formal setting, and takes this opportunity to have some fun with it. For instance, at my brother’s rehearsal dinner he had an island theme with a reggae band and Jamaican food because his honeymoon was going to be in Jamaica. This less formal setting will allow family members to meet for the first time and get acquainted.
If you’re wondering who should be invited to the rehearsal dinner then don’t worry. It’s typically the people that were at your rehearsal ceremony, such as immediate family, the wedding part and their spouses, and any close friends you feel need to be there.
Before the dinner is served, the bride and groom should take the opportunity to thank everyone and offer a few kind words to the wedding party. It is normal for toasts to be a part of the dinner.
The burden of the cost of the dinner usually falls on the groom’s parents. However, as traditions with weddings are rapidly changing, it’s normal for it to be hosted by anyone.
