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Scary Phrases

Very Scary Phrases

Scary phrases:

You need a root canal

Damn and I thought that was the Novocain

You have the right to remain silent

Sir , do you know how fast you were going

He wasn’t wearing a seat belt

Another increase in gas prices today

And Congress is back in session today

Honey, we need to talk

I’m sorry sir, your credit card was declined

We have lost a wheel. This might be a rough landing

It builds character…

John., I know you have been with the company for 15 years, but ….

Thank you for your recent application. We had many candidates for the job and we regret to ….

Well, it is the transmission and …

Happy 30th birthday….

Life begins after 40….

We have reviewed your tax returns and

Jones, can you see me in my office

I am sorry sir, the warranty ran out

Look on the bright side…

Your monthly payments have been increased to

We’re from the government and we’re here to help you..

We going to have to quarantine you for a few days

It’s interesting that you should say that…

Did you back up your data?

Well she is taking you back to court , as it seems

Wow, that bald spot is growing

Whoops, there was a slight mix-up in the lab and

Your proctologist called

There might be a slight chance of erectile dysfunction

We have tickets for the play Mr. Lincoln

Atilla the who is outside?

Today, car executives came back to Washington, seeking another

OPEC got together today and decided to

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We should have New Orleans cleaned up and back to normal by

We should have IRAQ stabilized by

And we can do it without tax increases

You can always put off retirement until …

Politicians admit that the recovery is taking longer than expected

The President is certain that if he can get the Middle East warring factions together at the conference table…..

Today, the biggest federal budget in history was approved by

The government will now run health care...

Look this won’t hurt..

I can’t understand. It was a simple operation …

Don’t worry Mrs. Jones, they have made major advancements in adult diapers..

Well, it appears that his life insurance policy expired two days before…

Well I hope you have a sense of humor because ….

What could happen?

Relax honey, I know all about electricity

Honestly honey, why waste money on a plumber..

Hmm, what happens if I pull this wire …

We regret to inform you ….

Bernie Madoff was handling your portfolio and

Today the Dow Jones set a new record, plunging to

Honey, do you know where the shut-off valve is?

It’s only a small leak, we should be able to make it back to port.

Mr. Jones, many men can function without …

A few more troops on the ground and we …..

Ohh,, that can’t be good..

You mean it was the other tooth?

Your tests came back positive.

Well here’s an analogy. We can either rotor rooter your veins or use Liquid Drano.

The good news is that you are eligible for unemployment

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It seems that they increased your deductible, so

Well at the time it seemed like a good idea, but

If I had known at the beginning

Well, it wasn’t exactly clear but I went ahead and

I am sober enough to drive

What did you say?

Hey, it’s not exactly perfect, but ….

Well, not exactly a profit

We have some questions about these deductions

I think we can make it a month or two without heath insurance.

I am positive the gun is not loaded

Can you say octuplets?

You might want to sit down…

Do you take this man as your…

I do

Well you’ve had a good run with the company, but

It seems like our pension fund made some bad investments ….

College tuition will raise another ten percent at ….

Dad, I know what I’m doing.

Honey, who is Bambi?

Hmm, it seems there is a small problem …

Normally I am not that far off in my calculations

Remember, that was just an estimate

Well when we got into the engine , we

I have an idea…

It happens to a lot of people your age

Of course, you have to remember, you’re not as young as you were

Have you thought about giving up drinking?

Dear, Jerry Springer is on the phone

It’s not rocket science, honey , a two year old can figure it.

Now which terminal is positive, which one is negative,

Now that’s an interesting development

What was I thinking?

Who knew a few zeros could make such a big difference

Didn’t see that coming

I wish it could have worked out differently

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I love you

Okay, let’s try Plan B

Well, we can be just friends

What was that?

How many times have I told you..

Well ,Mr. Jones, not every kid is college material

Hmm, whoops, took a bit too much off the top, Mrs. Jones. But I think we can fix it by…

Well, your hair didn’t come out exactly blonde...

Everyone gains a few pounds at your age…

How was I suppose to know?

Dad, where is the fire extinguisher?

The Democrats have an overwhelming majority in Congress …

But this time is different…

First, we know it’s not your fault, but

You better call your lawyer

With good behavior, you should get out in