Respect is a Two-Way Street Between Parents and Children
One of the biggest complaints that parents have about their children is that their kids don’t show them respect. Respect is generally defined as a feeling of admiration for another person as a result of their achievements, qualities or abilities. As a parent, you may feel that you deserve respect simply because of the fact that you brought your children into the world and have spent years of your time, energy and money raising them. You feel that you have made numerous sacrifices for them, and that these sacrifices are worthy of respect.
Respect is a Two-Way Street
Most kids, however, do not view the fact that you have given so selflessly of your time and resources as something worthy of respect. Many view this as something that is expected of you because you are their parent. While parents view respect as something that is inherently deserved, kids view respect as something that is earned and even learned.
In fact, many kids feel that their parents don’t respect them, and this feeling correlates to a lack of respect that kids feel for their parents. Consider, for example, that your kids expect you to provide for them and care for them while you expect your kids to behave appropriately, do their best in school and otherwise be upstanding kids. Do you show your kids respect for their accomplishments in these areas? Many parents don’t view these as things worthy of respect because they expect their kids to do these things. The fact is that respect is a two-way street, and you have to show and tell your kids that you respect them for being such great kids. In return, they may just respect you for being such a great parent.
It is a common misconception that respect is something that we feel naturally toward others.When you pause and consider the people who you respect the most in life, it is often those who have been truly upstanding citizens, who have gone above and beyond in their accomplishments or who have stood out and achieved extraordinary things in life. Your respect great leaders, those who have devoted their life to community service, legendary musicians and others. If you want your kids to respect you for just being who you are, you must teach them how to respect others for being themselves, too. Respect can be earned, but it can also be learned. When you show kids who you respect and why, they may learn how to respect others more deeply, too.
If you have been struggling with getting kids to respect you as a parent, you may be frustrated and may blame them for their lack of respect. However, with some introspection, you may discover that you can take action to teach them how to respect you as well as others in their life more fully.
Here are a few other articles written by this author:
