Since we don’t all have the luxury of an expensive therapist, we can use the same principles of Narrative Therapy to reach inner peace through the simple act of daily journaling.
When you journal, you are essentially constructing a narrative of your own life, which is why it only makes sense to use Narrative Therapy techniques. Narrative therapy is a branch of psychology in which the therapist helps the client construct a rich personal story as a means of better understanding himself. Below are a few tips for meaningful journaling:
Create your own narrative: Sounds simple, right? It is! Simply ramble about your day, who said what, and how it affected you. We’ll get into the meanings and the juicy stuff a little later. It is important that you take at least a paragraph to outline the parts of your day you consider most influential or most important.
Use the outside observer: If something is particularly troubling to you, use the outside observer. Lets say you had a spat with a family member or friend in which one or both people were emotionally hurt. First, tell the story from your perspective, as detailed as you can. Then, rewrite your story as if you are now a fly on the wall, or a spider in the corner of the room, quietly observing the situation. Writing in this way helps you become impartial and view your situation from the third-person perspective. We do this because it is easy to get emotionally wrapped up in our own stories, which gives us a bias. Most of the time, we just need to be that spider on the wall and observe our interactions as objectively as possible.
Give a voice to an object: Lets say you were playing basketball with some friends and they complained that you weren’t passing the ball enough. Maybe you happen to be a better player than everyone else on the court, but the fact is you know they are upset at you for some reason. For a moment, pretend that the basketball has its own voice. What would it say? Maybe it would say, “Hey, we’ve been hanging out for a while, and your buddy really wants to have a go with me-maybe you can pass me over to her.” Or maybe it would say something like, “You really are talented, and it is a pleasure to fly through the net so many times. Thank you.” As silly as it sounds, it will help you construct a narrative of what is going on in your life-it is important to entertain even the silliest idea or object. By pretending that everything has an opinion or a thought, we indirectly learn about ourselves.
Construct someone else’s narrative: This can be hard, but try to tell your story from someone else’s perspective. Using the basketball scenario, construct the experience through the words of your friend(s) in attendance. You might learn something about them, and you might learn something about yourself. The most important thing with narrative journaling is being open, non-judgmental, and curious to all interpretations of the experience.
Redesign your own narrative: First, accept exactly what happened, because you can’t go back and change it. Now, write down a narrative of how you would’ve liked to see your day go. Be realistic, but creative, and utilize the aforementioned techniques. Give every object and person of significance a voice and their own story. While the narrative journaling technique might take a little longer than freely associating your thoughts, the chances are greater that you will learn more about who you are, which enables us to become better social creatures.
Narrative therapy’s goal is to help us understand our stories and how they affect our lives. By being curious and non-judgmental with ourselves, we can arrive at deep, rich understandings of who we are in context with others simply by creating, analyzing, and redesigning our own stories.
