When your son or daughter becomes a teenager, you might find that disciplining them becomes quite a challenge. When they were children, you could spank them when you wanted to punish them. You made them sit by themselves for a certain period of time or sent them to bed half an hour earlier than usual time. When they were young, these strategies were perfect. But with teenagers, they just can’t be applied. How can you spank someone who is even taller than you?
So what do you do when you want to discipline your teenager? Sometimes they don’t even listen to whatever you are saying.
We should first understand the difference between discipline and punishment. Discipline is about training them to behave in a certain manner and regulate their behavior according to certain rules. For that you have to instill a sense of responsibility in them and make them understand the proper manner and the consequences of their behavior. Punishment, on the other hand, is more about power and authority. When your child behaves improperly, you use your power to change his behavior. Punishment can be an effective tool to discipline a child, especially in younger years. On the other hand, discipline is an end in itself. You discipline your children, so that they understand their responsibilities and their role in the society. The problem occurs when the teenagers don’t listen to their parents and don’t pay attention to any efforts to discipline them. This leads to parents punishing their teenagers to enforce discipline.
A parent must bear certain things in mind when dealing with a teenager. This is the period of life when freedom is very important for them. They want to live their life in their own way and don’t like parents’ interference or control. On the other hand, parents have their own expectations from their teenagers. They want their teenagers to behave properly and get good grades at school. That creates a situation of conflict.
Parents need to find some way to discipline their teenagers in these circumstances. Most teenagers value their social lives, they like to use the family car and enjoy many other activities. This gives a means in the hands of the parents to discipline their teenagers. They can threaten to take these things away or not let them take part in their favorite activity, if the teenagers did not behave appropriately. For example, parents can stop their teenagers from using the family car if they are not nice with their siblings.
You should take care that you are consistent when using this approach. If you make a rule, you should make sure that it is followed. Also let the teenager know your concern about their education and their future and make them understand that depriving them of their favorite item is just a means to that end.
It is important to be communicative and open to them. You should be their friend and a companion. In your zeal to enforce discipline, you should not become an authoritarian parent. You should be firm with teenagers, but being overly strict could hamper their natural growth or turn them rebellious.
