Categories: Parenting

Why the Conventional Wisdom Against Spanking is Wrong

COMMENTARY | In the 1950s, the behavior of your children was a symbol of your “status” in society as a respectable citizen. Most parents led a decent life and their children’s behavior was simply a way of reflecting that. Proper manners and good etiquette were the norm and were rigidly enforced; and there’s plenty of anecdotal evidence that suggests society was more structured with less mental anxiety and random acts of violence.

When a child misbehaved back in the “olden days,” parents would often take a belt, paddle or switch to their child’s rear end and many schools did the same. In fact, according to the Center for Effective Discipline, 99 percent of parents supported the use of corporal punishment in the 1950s. By today’s standards, many regard the “woodshed style” whippings of the 1950s to be strict, harsh, and abusive. The question is, to what effect?

Although laws and interpretations of such laws vary, spanking a child reasonably and in a controlled manner is in fact not abusive — it’s legal in all 50 states and the District of Columbia. Using an implement such as a belt, brush, paddle or switch to discipline your child is also generally not considered abusive unless it leaves marks. No state law explicitly prohibits spanking a child of any age with or without an implement. In fact, the Texas Attorney General’s website states that belts and hair brushes are “not likely” to be considered abusive, while Oklahoma law specifically cites “spanking, switching and paddling” as “ordinary force” when it comes to child discipline. Social services agencies often form their own definitions of abuse; but state laws across the country make it clear that parents have a right to discipline and guide the upbringing of their children.

To put it in perspective, adult consequences are a lot harsher than a simple belt “whipping” or paddling. Police and corrections officials use varying levels of physical force to apprehend, constrain, confine, and control offenders; and to maintain law and order in society. We all agree that police and corrections officials are authority figures who must sometimes use physical force to control others. Similarly, parents are authority figures who must sometimes use spanking to control their children’s behavior. A disrespectful child isn’t a criminal, but bad behavior can easily escalate to behavior that could be considered illegal if an adult had committed it. Are parents who don’t effectively discipline their children setting them up for failure as adults? And is spanking the answer?

Law enforcement usually defers to parents to control their children; they prefer not get involved in such situations. Police also don’t reward everyday citizens for good behavior — it’s simply expected. The modern theme of positive reinforcement for misbehaving children has its place, but so does strict old-fashioned discipline. Time outs” and suspensions from school seem more like a holiday than a punishment to a misbehaving child. Verbal scolding can become psychologically detrimental if left unchecked. But just like the child who touches the hot stove and feels pain, a spanking can reinforce the message that “this type of behavior is not acceptable.”

Dr. Marjorie Gunnoe, a psychology professor at Calvin College in Michigan, published a study in 2010 finding that young kids who were spanked did better at school and were more optimistic about their lives than kids who were never spanked. “The claims made for not spanking children fail to hold up,” she said, because “they are not consistent with the data.”

Spanking opponents often make sweeping claims that childhood spankings lead to “violent” children. But Dr. Aric Sigman, an Associate Fellow of the British Psychological Society, claims that the idea that childhood spankings and violent behavior are somehow connected is “bizarre.” A 2009 study published in the Akron Law Review concluded that spankings do lead to violence, but only if spanking is banned. Jason Fuller of the University of Akron Law School found that a spanking ban in Sweden led to a 500 percent increase in child abuse, and criminal assaults committed by youths skyrocketed sixfold.

Dr. Sigman recommends that spankings should be administered “judiciously” rather than as an abusive reflex or out of anger. When any punishment is doled out with anger, not just spanking, the potential for long-term psychological damage exists. The anti-spanking studies always suggest that angry parents are harming their kids by spanking them -parents are actually harming their kids by getting angry and leaving their emotions unchecked, regardless of which method of punishment method they use.

Dr. Diana Baumrind of the University of California, Berkeley, and her team of research associates conducted an in-depth study that tracked children over time. The study found “no evidence for unique detrimental effects of normative physical punishment,” and to the contrary noted that children who were never spanked tended to have more behavioral problems. Dr. Robert Larzelere of the University of Nebraska Medical Center concurred, with his own study finding that nonabusive spanking produced no harmful effects and reduced misbehavior in young children.

The use of physical force is society’s way of maintaining law and order and we all deem it reasonable and necessary in certain circumstances. Disciplining your children should be one of them. The anti-spanking arguments fail to legally, morally, and psychologically hold up — even the anti-spanking American Psychological Association acknowledges that spanking is the most effective punishment for immediate compliance. As people continue to jump on the anti-spanking bandwagon, morality in society continues to deteriorate – with bullying, school shootings and other random acts of violence now seemingly the norm. The manners and etiquette of yesteryear have all but faded as society becomes more tolerant and defensive of out-of-control children. Many things change, but one thing has been accurate from the beginning of mankind — if you spare the rod, you spoil the child.

Karla News

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