Weight Loss: I Have No Willpower!

There aren’t many amongst us who hasn’t said, at some point, that he or she wished they had stronger willpower–whether it be to stop smoking, drinking, or eating things that are bad for health and weight. Willpower isn’t all there is to losing weight, and in fact, fighting for willpower can actually lead to weight gain and destroy all benefits from a particular diet when willpower fails.

I’ve struggled with my weight ever since my second child was born–going from slightly underweight to overweight and everywhere in between–and I understand first hand the guilt that comes from feeling you have no willpower.

Yet, I successfully quit smoking cold turkey without a single thought or struggle. I regularly pull myself away from fun activities and force myself to work when I need to work, etc. In other words, I have willpower in all other aspects of my life, so following a weight loss diet or not following it really doesn’t come down to an issue of willpower for me. Still, I often give in to the guilt I feel when I don’t follow a diet properly.

If you’re like me, you’ve probably struggled with the willpower issue too. How many times have you wanted to pull your hair out and say, “I have no willpower!”?

Don’t blame the failure of a particular diet on willpower, though. Actually, it’s not willpower or the lack of willpower that’s the problem when trying to maintain or lose weight. It’s actually not the diet’s fault either, because any healthy diet that is followed properly with some moderate exercise will work.

No, the biggest detriment to weight loss is not the diet or the willpower.

It’s the guilt.

So let’s look at some ways to alleviate the guilt so willpower works!

Understanding Willpower & Temptation

Willpower is an unseen, unfelt ‘force’ that many say is the reason weight loss fails. Willpower is innate, yet we often personify it by giving it so much power over us that willpower is what we say controls what we do or do not put in our mouths. Some say, “I have no willpower!” Others say, “I wish I had some willpower.”

Where is this willpower, and how can I go buy me some?

To understand willpower, it’s important to understand how our brain works and what temptation truly is.

From a very young age, we are told not to do certain things, and while many of us listened to our parents and didn’t do the things we were told not to do, most of us, at some point, questioned the reasons why we weren’t supposed to do them.

Temptation comes in, and some of us actually had to do those things we were told not to do, just to see for ourselves. Of course, this is the ‘teen’ years, and part of why adolescence was just oh so much fun.

Well, temptation and willpower is not so dissimilar to those teen years for us. Our brains often want to know why when we tell ourselves we can’t have something we want to eat. That when we experience temptation–we know we should not have chocolate cake on our diet, but we WANT chocolate cake. Never mind that we don’t really LIKE chocolate cake. We just WANT it.

We don’t even know why!

The ‘why’ is temptation. It’s often human nature to want what we can’t have, what we shouldn’t have, or what someone else has.

We give in, have one bite, then feel guilty.

And that guilt leads to another bite, and then another, and before you know it, it’s not a bite, or a slice, but the whole chocolate cake! After all, once you’ve gone so far, you may as well go all out, right?

Okay, maybe that’s extreme (but not for everyone!), but the point is: when you make something off limits, you’re going to want it even more.

It’s not your fault, really. It’s human nature.

Weight Loss & Temptation: Understanding Human Nature

The way to overcome willpower is to prevent temptation. If you are going to go to a party with lots of foods you know you love, you’re flirting with danger. Willpower will be the little angel on your shoulder saying, “Don’t eat that!” and temptation will be the little devil on your shoulder saying, “Aw, come on, one bite won’t hurt you!”

The problem with the two little shoulder people is that the little devil is actually right. One little bite won’t hurt you, and the angel on your shoulder isn’t being much fun. So since the devil makes logical sense, you can convince yourself that one bite really won’t hurt you.

But we never do eat just one bite, do we? Pesky little devil.

What to do?

Eat healthy foods before going to a party. Drink plenty of ice-cold water to keep your stomach full, or iced tea or diet soda if you must or can’t stomach water. Not only is water good for you in other ways, but you actually burn calories drinking it ice cold!

Also, remember that disallowing any food on a diet is not going to work, because it just increases your temptation. Learn to eat a healthy, well-balanced diet, that includes plenty of fruits, vegetables, healthy protein, good carbohydrates, and yes, even some chocolate cake, or whatever your weakness happens to be (mine is currently crème brulee cheesecake). Never eliminate a complete food group from your diet, and always allow a little wiggle room for a treat.

These steps will reduce your temptation and allow the little devil on your shoulder to be right, so you can take just that one little bite, and you won’t have to feel guilty about it or ruin your diet.

Willpower is Powerless & Temptation CAN be Fun

So if you’re trying to lose weight and you’re screaming, “I have no willpower!” then what you need to do is sit back and rethink your weight loss strategy. Don’t give more power to willpower than it deserves!