Parent Tips on Child Behavior Management

Are you feeling frustrated because you’re having a difficult time managing your child’s behavior? Are you unsure how to go about managing your child’s behavior? To help understand common challenges parents face when dealing with their child’s behavior and for child behavior management tips, I have interviewed therapist Meredith Gardner, LPC, PLLC.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.
“I have a master’s degree in Clinical Counseling from Johns Hopkins University. For the past 15 years I have worked with children, adolescents and families in the DC metro area. I have a private practice in Washington, DC specializing in emotional and behavioral issues. I use cognitive-behavioral therapy when working with many of my clients, which can be very helpful when working with children and families.”

What are common challenges a parent faces when dealing with child behavior?
There are many challenges parents face when dealing with behaviors of their children. Children are going to misbehave and push the limits; it’s in their job description. It’s the job of parents to make sure they respond appropriately when this happens. Often parents are tired which can make parenting harder. They can lose their temper with children, or ignore problem behaviors because they are too exhausted to deal with them. I find that the biggest challenges for parents are being consistent and following through when behavior issues come up.”

What child behavior management tips can you give parents?
“Parents need to be clear with children about rules and limits. They also need to be clear about what happens when children break the rules (ie: if you watch TV before you finish your homework you will lose TV privileges for a week). When a rule is broken (hit their sister, missed curfew, etc.) parents have to address the issue. Once the behavior has been addressed, an appropriate consequence has to be given. Once a consequence is given you must follow through. If you say you’re going to take the phone away for a week, then you need to keep the phone for a week. If the child lost gaming privileges for the weekend, then make sure they’re not playing Saturday or Sunday. Whatever you say you’re going to do, you must do. If you constantly make empty threats then children will no longer fear consequences and in turn will not work to change their behaviors.

If there are regular behaviors you are dealing with, often having a behavioral management system in place can be helpful. With this type of system you target 1 -3 behaviors you want your child to focus on. You make a chart with the goals clearly stated and you reward the child for reaching her goals each day. This type of system focuses on positive reinforcement and can be very effective, as long as parents are able to follow through.

What type of professional help is available for parents who are having trouble managing their child’s behavior?
Many mental health professionals such as counselors, social workers and other therapists are available to work with kids and parents. Often when parents feel like they no longer have control they seek the help and support of a professional. Counselors are often able to assess reasons children are acting out in the first place, can work with the child on those behaviors, and can help you set up a behavior management system in your home. Often pediatricians or school counselors are able to refer you to a therapist who can help your family when you feel over whelmed and out of control.

Thank you Meredith for giving parent tips on managing child behavior. For more information on Meredith Gardner or her work you can check out her website on http://www.meredithgardner.com/.

Recommended Readings:
How to Manage Your Anger with Your Child
How to Stop a Temper Tantrum
How to Listen to Your Child

Reference:

• www.meredithgardner.com/