The family kitchen table can turn into a battleground at homework time. Many parents become frustrated as they struggle with the best way to motivate their child to complete his assigned work. At the same time, the child often feels tired, irritable and overwhelmed at the prospect of more school work on top of the seven or so hours he has already put in for the day. With frustration mounting on both sides, an explosion is almost a certainty. So if you are currently engaged in a homework war with your child, here are some factors to consider:
Adapt Homework Rules to Your Child’s Personality
Some children will do best diving right in to their homework after school while they are still in a school “state of mind” with the ideas and material presented still fresh. Others need an hour or so to relax after school in order to be able to focus again and tackle their homework. Many children benefit from a completely quiet, secluded study area with no distractions, while some children find it easier to concentrate with music playing in the background. Depending on the number of distractions at home, some children may require an after-school study group or time at the school library each day in order to be able to focus. Finding the right time and correct enviorment in which your child works best will go a long way in ensuring homework success.
Timing Is Everything
If you have a child with a tendency to procrastinate when it comes to completing his homework, then a set schedule is a must. It’s much better to set a simple rule like “homework must be completed between 4 pm and 6 pm” than to deal with the drawn-out drama of a procrastinator who is always going to start his homework “on the next commercial” or “after this level on Mario Kart” or “after dinner”–all of which really translates into “I’m going to pull out my homework five minutes before bedtime and we’ll both have a meltdown. Again.” Likewise, if you have a child who is a “homework hurrier” and rushes through an hour’s worth of homework in ten minutes flat so that he can get to the tv or the Xbox, then you definitely need to set a schedule. For example, remind your child that he will still only be allowed to watch television between 7 and 8:30 pm no matter what time he finishes his homework. Sticking to a schedule is key whether you are dealing with a procrastinator or a young Mario Andretti attempting to complete his vocabulary sentences in world-record time. Remember that good habits are learned over time, so be consistent.
Don’t Take Responsiblity for Your Child’s Homework
Many parents fall into this trap and find themselves solving their child’s algebra equations while he sits comfortably on the sofa watching repeats of “Phineas and Ferb. Every parent wants their child to be successful in school, and some find it’s less of a battle to simply do the homework for the child. However, the purpose of homework is not just to give the child additional practice material in the subject matter. Homework is also about instilling self-discipline, teaching time management skills, and encouraging organization and planning. None of these lessons are learned when the child is able to shift his responsibility over to a parent. When it comes to the homework game, parents should think of themselves as hands-off coach and not as one of the players. You are not doing your child any favors by thwarting the development of his problem-solving skills or protecting him from the consequences of his own actions when he doesn’t complete his assignments. Your job is to praise him for completing his homework and to encourage his independence by complimenting his initiative when he finishes his assignments on his own.
With a little scheduling and a lot of consistency, a bit of tweaking of his environment and some patience and persistence you can guide your child through the homework battlefield without any casualties.
