Nobody likes change. Change is difficult. Change forces us out of our comfort zone. However, more often than not, changes occur because they must, and when they do we usually find we are better off afterwards. But what do you do when you acknowledge that something needs to change and yet you don’t know where to start?
Kurt Lewin was a psychologist in the early 1900’s who taught that change had to occur in three stages. He labeled these stages Unfreeze, Change, Refreeze. Once you study these phases and understand how to use them to your advantage you can begin making changes in any area of your life: use them to change your career; to change your relationship; even to change your health.
The basis of Lewin’s model was changing a block of ice. If you wanted to change ice from one shape to a completely different form, what would you need to do? You could try chipping away at the ice and hoping it would come out looking somewhat close to your desired goal form. But wouldn’t it be simpler to alter the ice from a block into liquid and then back into the shape you want? That is the premise of this technique. Unfreeze the “block of ice”, Change it into water, the Refreeze it into the form you’d like it to be.
Okay, so you understand the concept of changing ice, but how can you apply that to your life? The steps are pretty simple, although that doesn’t mean it will be easy. Each phase takes time. How much time? Well, precisely as long as it takes! For example, let’s say that you would like to make the changes it would take to finally lose weight and get into shape.
Starting at the beginning, you will need to Unfreeze your current situation. Basically you will list the why’s, what’s, when’s and who’s. You would do this by determining a convincing reason why the change needs to take place, what needs to happen for this change to occur, when these things should take place, and who needs to be involved in the steps to the change. So if your desired change was to lose weight, your Unfreezing might go something like the scenario below.
For the why’s, you will make yourself a list of the most compelling reasons you want to lose weight. Make the reasons very specific. For example rather than “better health” you might say “to lower my risk of diabetes and heart disease. Rather than “to look better” you might say “to wear that sexy size 6 dress and turn my husband’s head. Keep your list for future motivation. For the what’s, log everything that needs to occur, again being very specific: “I need to get at least 30 minutes of exercise every day. I need to drink at least 64 ounces of water every day.” For the where’s and when’s, set a date to commence your Change stage. And for the who’s you will determine in this case that you are ultimately responsible, but also list people that you can count on like your sister when you need to vent, your buddy to exercise with you, your spouse to help you keep only healthy food in the house.
The Unfreeze change can be very trying. There are reasons why you hang on to the old behaviors and it can be scary to consider letting them go. It is helpful if you can uncover why you cling to the old behaviors so that you can find different, usually healthier ways of dealing with these issues. You might even find that you no longer have the issue that drove the behavior and yet you have hung on to it simply because it has become second nature.
Now on to the Change stage. During this phase you will put into action all those thoughts, plans and ideas you formed during the Unfreeze phase. Give yourself lots of positive reinforcement. Remind yourself why you are making the changes and what the rewards and benefits will be. When you are going through trying, uncomfortable periods, call to mind times in the past when you struggled through changes and came out flourishing. Appeal to those people who have committed to help you during this time of change. If you find there are people in your life who seem to be sabotaging your efforts – oftentimes unconsciously – call them on the carpet and let them know you are making the change even if it makes them uncomfortable. If they continue to negatively interfere, distance yourself from them during this time. If that is not possible you will need to consistently remind yourself that many people fear change, even in others, but that you have substantial reasons for following through.
Finally you will enter the Refreeze stage. This is when you set in concrete that your change is now a permanent part of your life. Refreezing is hard to put a beginning and end point to. The Refreezing stage may begin to take place during the Change stage and may sometimes still feel like a struggle. However, there are steps you can take to assist the Refreezing phase.
Look back at the lists you made during the Unfreeze stage. Take note of the why’s for the change and see which have been fostered or corrected. For example perhaps your blood pressure and/or blood sugar have significantly lowered. Or maybe you have dropped a dress size or two. These successes will help anchor you into the Unfreeze stage. Look back at your what’s and acknowledge or reward yourself for the many times you have followed through with your required steps. Continue to rely on your support system. Also, it is exceedingly important to look at what steps worked well and which did not and adjust accordingly. This should be done throughout your change.
So remember. Take your time, do your homework in the beginning, adapt as needed and follow through. Soon you’ll see your desired change becoming a new reality.
