If you’ve finished the guest list, selected the menu and started thinking about the seating arrangements, then you may have been wondering whether you should have a receiving line. The tradition of forming a receiving line at the wedding draws mixed emotions. Of course, you would like to personally greet each guest and thank him or her for sharing your special day, but do you have to spend the first hour of your married life standing in a line? The guests are anxious to speak to you and leave lipstick on your cheeks, but as a veteran guest can tell you-it’s not always fun waiting in the receiving line.
So what is a caring, but trend-changing couple to do about the receiving line? I’ve gathered ideas from near and far to help you with this dilemma. Before I fill your head with visions of non-traditional ideas, let’s discuss the traditional receiving line.
Tradition
According to the rules of etiquette, the receiving line should be formed at the reception following the ceremony or, according to other sources, immediately after the wedding ceremony before your guests leave for the reception. The order of the line is as follows: Mother of the Bride, Mother of the Groom, Bride, Groom, Maid of Honor and finally the bridesmaids. The most formal receiving line does not include the men of the bridal party (with the exception of the groom). Child attendants are also left out of this one. The order and makeup of the receiving line is acceptably open to change. Such exceptions include adding the groomsmen and fathers, adding children attendants or changing the order or the line.
If you choose to follow tradition, you’ll want to decide whether to have the receiving line at the ceremony or reception site. When making your decision, consider the needs of your guests, the weather, the space required for the line and any other special circumstances. You won’t want to be standing in the rain and neither will your guests. You also don’t want to make your guests wait around for too long standing in line, so consider ways to make the process efficient and comfortable for everyone.
Your Options
The receiving line does play a crucial role in your wedding celebration. Standing in a receiving line allows you to meet your new family and greet each guest personally. Greeting the guests is a necessary part of your evening and should never be eliminated. What I’m suggesting in the following options is a twist on the traditional-a way of spicing up the greeting process.
Option 1 – Take a Stroll: Stroll through the ceremony and visit your guests at their tables. This will give you a chance to speak with them in groups and thank each one at the same time. This could also be a time when you have the photographer take snapshots or your guests can use cameras you provide. You will need to have the master of ceremonies announce that there will not be a receiving line when the guests have arrived at the reception. You can then make your way around following dinner to greet your guests.
Option 2 – Meet and Greet: If you’re planning a cocktail hour preceding the reception you could turn it into a meet-and-greet. Rather than hanging out in your limo or bridal room before the reception, mingle with your guests during the cocktail hour. You will need to make sure that you limit your conversation to a brief ‘hello’ and ‘thank you’ so that you have a chance to speak with everyone. Travel with the groom and your mothers or just the groom. Have the Maid of Honor tag along to keep you moving through the crowd. You can exit before the cocktail hour ends and return to the reception for your grand entrance.
Option 3 – Dance the Night Away: This is an option for the most ambitious of couples. Instead of a traditional receiving line at the reception door, transfer your guests to the dance floor. Have your guests stand in a circle around the dance floor. The bridal party can be announced to the center of the floor and make their way around the circle meeting and greeting the guests. The music should be entertaining to keep the guests from being bored stiff on the dance floor. Maybe you could even add some entertainment to the mix-a live band could help with this one. When you’ve greeted everyone turn the circle into a group of dancers and you’ve already started the party!
Of course you will need to take into account elderly guests and special circumstances when you vary the receiving line. Make a mental note of those that you will need to greet in a special way. You may even want to have a bridesmaid keep a list handy for you so you don’t miss anyone.
In the end, don’t forget that the receiving line is a time when you can connect with each guest, thank them and give them your love, and is a time for new family members to meet the bride and groom and their parents. You’ll want to try to keep your interaction to a few minutes or less per guest, so make a game plan as a family for how you will greet each person and how to keep the line moving. One possibility is to have an usher waiting at the end of the line to escort each guest to their next destination. He can act as a gentle reminder to keep things moving. Everyone wants to kiss the bride and groom but no one wants to wait in line, so be considerate of your guests needs and choose the receiving line that will work best for your wedding.
