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6 Reasons Why You Shouldn’t Spank Your Child

Child Visitation, Parenting Classes, Positive Discipline

“He just needs a good spanking,” barks your mother-in-law over the three year old temper tantrum erupting on her living room floor. Is she right? Would a spanking calm him down, stop the tantrum? Most likely not, it would probably result in the exact opposite. His alligator tears turning into full-blown, heart-stopping sobs, followed by record breaking snot bubbles bursting on his face. There may be some circumstances that call for corporal punishment, but a three year old temper tantrum is definitely not one of them.

There are 6 really good reasons why you shouldn’t spank your child. Any one of them should be enough to cause you to reconsider before your hand comes down on your child’s backside. All 6 are equally important to consider, and are laid out in random order.

1. Spanking teaches the child that violence is the answer to problems. Children learn first by example. If you resort to violence to solve your problems; then your children will learn to do the same. Whether you like it or not, spanking a child is an act of violence.

2. Spanking creates a wall between child and parent; built brick by brick of fear, anger, anxiety, and confusion.

3. Sometimes spankings cause the child to shut down or block out the parent. Therefore, the lesson is not learned. The child begins to shut down and shut out the parent. All they hear is, “I don’t love you,” or “I don’t care about your feelings,” they do not hear the lesson you are trying to teach them, and chances are you will be in the same situation before too long.

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4. Spanking doesn’t actually solve the problem. Instead it can create more problems to solve down the road. A good parent will find constructive ways to help their child learn life lessons, rather than destructive ones.

5. Repeated spanking can cause the child to build up resistance; leaving little to no room for stricter discipline later in life. Just like repeated dosages of medications, the child can build a resistance. What began as a bit harder than a love pat; will eventually need to become full-on hitting to have the same effect.

6. Spanking for discipline instills a belief that discipline must hurt. This can lead to a life lived in fear of retaliation; the child growing up to be the punisher or the punished in their relationships. Every time the growing child faces a discipline moment, they become afraid of correction and change. Or they learn that they way to get people’s attention is by acting out.

If none of these reasons work to persuade you to find an alternative to spanking, maybe the threat of child protective services knocking on your door will. If you have to spank your child at home, it’s only a matter of time before you’ll have to spank in public. This puts your choice of discipline on showcase for the world to see, which allows those who feel it’s their duty to protect every child in America to bring attention on you. Once child protective services are in your life, it is next to impossible to get them out of it.

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So, just don’t spank, it doesn’t help anyone and can actually cause more harm than good. There are alternatives.