School days are supposed to be the best time of a person’s life. In today’s world, kids are becoming more split than ever. The one’s left behind are the one’s who are spending everyday of their life in fear. How many parents actually know when their child is being bullied? How many kids commit suicide because they no longer can endure the pain that is inflicted on them everyday? The statistics are troubling. Later we will give you the signs that your child may be in danger. This is a true story of the life of a bully victim.
Jacob was born on January 13, 1993. To his parents he was the joy of the world. Jacob grew up in a home with loving parents who would give him the world if he asked. Jacob had many friends when he was little, later he also became a big brother, twice. As the years went on Jacob started school in a small town. His list of friends grew while he was in Kindergarten and First Grade. Once Jacob hit second grade, it was like the whole world turned their back on him. As his classmates grew older, their attitudes grew poorer. Kids that claimed to be his friend just the year prior, turned into his worst enemies. These kids would harass Jacob, make fun of him, call him names. Jacob would alert the teachers of the behavior of his peers but in return, he was called a tattle-tale by the counselor of the school. This turned Jacob away from talking to teachers about the torment he faced everyday. Jacob’s parents were well aware of what was going on as Jacob was always the type of person that would express his fears and concerns to his parents, and his parents only. Jacob’s parents talked to several teachers about the behavior of the other kids and always received the same response, “Jacob takes things too personally.” Jacob’s mother recalls how this made her feel. I felt like no one at the school cared enough about my child to help him.” “I wanted to go to that school and scream to the kids how my son was a very caring person, and they would find nothing but a true friend in him!
As the school days went on, Jacob’s fear grew. It became such a situation everyday that Jacob’s mother pulled him from the bus and decided to take the children to school and pick them up daily. This took care of the harassment on the bus, but did not stop the harassment at school. Home schooling became a daily discussion, but that would only show Jacob that he could run from the bullies instead of taking care of the problem. How do you control other children that are not your own? That became the question on the minds of many parents in the areas that were experiencing the same with their bullied children.
As the years went on, Jacob seemed to be doing better. He had a more positive attitude with going to school, the bullies moved on to other victims. Jacob regularly expressed his concern for these children, but felt if he tried to help, he would soon again be a target. One day Jacob came to his parents and asked them if he could return to riding the bus as he felt it was a great burden on his mother for her to be driving them to and from school everyday. Hesitant, Jacob’s mother agreed.
That day, was the day, Jacob’s parents put their foot down and stood up for themselves. Jacob returned home from school crying frantically. When Jacob’s mother approached him, she was shocked when she saw he had a goose egg the size of a golf ball on his head. After Jacob calmed down, he slowly explained that he took a seat with a child on the bus, that swore at him to make him move, when Jacob refused, the child slammed Jacob’s head against the bus window/wall.
That was it, that was the day Jacob’s parents stood up for Jacob loudly. Jacob’s mother immediately put the children into the car, and headed down to the school to visit the Principal, on the way there, she dialed the Principal on her cell phone, asking him to stay there as she needed to speak with him. The Principal was hesitant as he had an appointment, but agreed to stay until she arrived. Into the office Jacob and his mother went. She explained the whole situation to the Principal. The Principal proceeded to question to Jacob as if he was the one who was at fault, asking Jacob questions that suggests that Jacob was the one who started this as the Principal has never had a problem with the other boy before. This in turn infuriated Jacob’s mother. As they were leaving, all they accomplished there, was the Principal would look into it.
Their next stop was the clinic to have Jacob’s head examined. Jacob would get the okay to leave the doctors and remain on bed rest for a couple days. On returning home, Jacob’s mother immediately phoned the police department as this was an assault on her son. The police department agreed, and referred her to the school liaison officer. She then phoned the School Board President, The Bus Captain and Jacob’s Teacher. Not being pleased with the response of the Principal, she was very pleased with the others she phoned.
The following day, the School Liaison Officer called up Jacob’s mother and gave her the options she had to go further with this, which included suing the parents of the boy who did this to Jacob. During the day, Jacob stayed home and rested and Jacob’s mother received phones calls from the Principal, who simply gave the boy a detention and the child’s mother.
Jacob’s mother recalls the other mother crying on the phone because of the fear she had of being sued. She promised Jacob’s mother this would be addressed with her child appropriately including a hand written apology to Jacob from the other boy.
Ultimately, that is all Jacob’s mother wanted, for the parents of the other boy to be involved in fixing this. I truly believe the schools do not involve the bullies parent in a lot of these cases, how can the parents fix what their children do, if they are not aware of it?
So for the mother to tell Jacob’s mom, that she would correct this behavior in her son, was better than the simple detention the school gave the boy.
In the end, Jacob never did receive the apology letter from the other boy but that does not concern Jacob anymore, over the past year, Jacob has grown from this, he no longer accepts what others tell him, he has made wonderful friends through his mother’s involvement in stopping bullying in our schools. “The bully victims, are standing together strong, they look out for one another, they care deeply for one another, they are true friends” says, Jacob’s mom.
Bullyicides are becoming more and more of a concern in today’s world. It is so very important for schools to get more involved in what is happening to our children. They need to take it more seriously and have harder consequences for these kids that bully others. Is your child be bullied? How would you know unless you have a child like Jacob that had no problem expressing his concerns to his parents? The following signs should be not taken lightly when it comes to your child.
1. Withdrawal from school activities that they at one time loved
These are all just a few of what your child could show as signs. Be aware of your child’s emotional state. Do they seem more depressed than usual? A lot of times, children will refuse their parents help when it comes to bullying of fear it will intensify the bullying. As parents, you need to overstep that and get involved, your child’s life is at stake. As we part today, know this, we can stop this if we all work together, we can make kids school life better by standing up and speaking our minds. Contact your school district and find out their policy on bullying today.
