Most Schoolhouse Rock songs are either fun or they have a great educational lesson. But not all of the Schoolhouse Rock songs were great. Some were boring and others didn’t have much of a lesson. These are the 10 worst cartoons from Schoolhouse Rock.
10. Any America Song
I hate to sound Anti-American, it’s not that I don’t like America. It’s just that the songs that Schoolhouse Rock wrote about America (except for Three-Ring Government) are extremely boring.
9. Electricity, Electricity
Schoolhouse Rock had Jack Sheldon, Louie the Lightning Bug himself but instead they went with the annoying girl singer. I guess the song is a pretty good lesson on electricity but it’s just annoying.
8. Them Not-So-Dry Bones
I can’t be the only one that was scared of the Skeleton Song when I was a kid. There is a skeleton inside of me? Help! Get it out! Get it out!
7. The Body Machine
First, I can’t be the only one concerned that the wheels on none of the vehicles are touching the ground. Second, I’m not even sure what this song was about because I was too distracted by being told that people are machines. This must be some kind of futuristic dystopia world this song takes place in.
6. Figure Eight
The lyrics of the eight song in Schoolhouse Rock is not great it’s just such a sad and depressing tune. I almost expect it to turn into a Jennifer Connelly movie.
5. The Tale of Mr. Morton
Mr. Morton is about nouns and predicates but it really the song focuses more on Mr. Morton than the lesson. Nobody cares about Mr. Morton! Teach us more English! Wait, did I just say I wanted to learn English. I need to stop watching Schoolhouse Rock before I become smart.
4. 3 is the Magic Number
In this Schoolhouse Rock song we’re told that three is the magic number because tricycles have three wheels, because a triangle has three sides and three points and because two parents and a child makes three. I don’t see what’s so magical about that. Are rectangles not as magical as triangles? They have four sides. If parents have three kids is that not magical? That would be five.
3. My Hero, Zero
I’m pretty disappointed at how bad the math songs are since it is my favorite subject. In this song we are told that the number zero is a hero, simply because 1 with a zero at the end makes 10. Not only is this no reason to serenade the number zero but it doesn’t really teach much other than all multiples of 10 end with zero.
2. Interplanetary Janet
I don’t even know what to think about Interplanetary Janet. Interplanetary Janet is some strange half girl-half rocket creature and she has the gall to say that humans look strange when she visits Earth. The second half is also kind of rushed. The first couple of songs they describe well but then the second half they are pretty general and just say things like Jupiter is big, Saturn has rings, Pluto is tiny.
1. Lolly, Lolly, Lolly, Get Your Adverbs
The lolly, lolly, lolly song on Schoolhouse Rock isn’t necessarily bad as far as teaching what an adverb is. The song is just really annoying. If I had kids and they watched Schoolhouse Rock I would pray this did not become their favorite song.
