If you are about to plan a wedding, you may be thinking about where to start. What kind of wedding do I want? What fits my budget? Who do I know what things to plan for? Do I want to be barefoot at sunset, or adorned in mountains of lace at my family church? Well I hope that I can clear things up for you here.
The first thing that you need to do is recruit help. Traditionally, it’s the Maid of Honor’s duty to help the bride plan her wedding. However, it’s easier if you also have someone who has been married before and knows what she is doing. My sister was my Maid of Honor and she knew less about wedding planning then I did, even with all of the books and magazines. So I asked (begged) my aunt to help. Along with my family and the help of “The Ultimate Brides Guide” by Annette Spence, my wedding became a moment that still gives me chills of joy.
After you have reeled in your help, you need to then decide what type of wedding you want to have. There are nine different wedding forms. They include; very formal, formal, semi-formal, informal, military, double wedding, candlelight ceremony, outdoor and garden and at-home.
A very formal wedding is the most expensive type of wedding, but is also the more traditional way to go. The ceremony is held in a church, synagogue, temple, large club, or a hotel during the evening. Generally there are around 200 plus guests. One usher is assigned to every fifty guests. There are between 4 and 12 attendants (groomsmen and bridesmaids), one or two flower girls, one or two ring bearers and one or two trainbearers, depending on the brides dress type. It’s a very richly decorated ceremony with elaborate floral decorations and very formal elegant gowns. Very formal weddings also include things such as; limousines, two types of engraved stationary (one for the ceremony and one for the reception), formal portraits, a professional bridal consultant and a large reception dinner with a life band for dancing.
The most popular wedding for modern brides is the formal wedding. The formal wedding still holds onto many traditions, but it is a little less expensive. It takes place at any time of the day that is convenient for the family. The wedding can be held in the same places as the very formal wedding, but also can be held at home. There are between two to six attendants and the best man can help user. The reception is still large, but not as elaborate as a very formal reception. Announcements for you wedding are on engraved invitations.
An informal wedding is very lenient. It is a day-time ceremony that can be held anywhere. The guest list consists only fifty or fewer guests and is usually made up of family and only close friends. Invitations to an informal wedding are usually handwritten or telephoned for both the ceremony and reception. Decorations floral or otherwise are optional and often sparse. Often the guests and wedding party bring dishes for reception dinner.
For those of you out there who are in the military, there is a wedding form just for you. A military wedding is usually formal and is characterized by the famous arches of sabers (swords) that hail the couple at the end of the ceremony. This form of wedding is only for commissioned officers of the armed forces or reserve officers who are on active duty. The bride and/or groom can choose to wear their uniforms or have traditional dresses and tuxes. The same goes for the attendants. As a rule, the fathers are the only men in the procession who wear civilian clothing, but your party may include brothers or other close friends dressed in formal attire. Instead of a boutonniere, the men of the wedding party wear military decorations. Also, the men and not the women wear swords or sabers. After the ceremony the bride and groom leave under the arch of sabers, but that’s not the last time that the saber or sword with be used. At the reception instead of cutting the cake with a cake knife, the bride and groom cut the cake with the groom’s weapon. Traditionally the decorations will include the colors red, white and blue and will feature miniature flags and regimental emblems. Officers invited are usually assigned to “seats of honor” according to rank.
One wedding style that is not very common, but can be a lot of fun is the double ceremony. This is when sisters or best friends decide to share a wedding. Not only is it a way to bond on this memorable day, but also it’s cost saving as well. This type of wedding is usually formal, with a separate set of attendants per couple. You can match each couple or compliment their best features and make them as different as possible. The brides and grooms also can act as the other couple attendants. As far as who would go first, it’s really up to you, but ordinarily the older of the two brides takes precedence. When it is sisters, the older sister is escorted down the isle by her father while the younger sister is escorted by a brother or other male relative.
Candlelight ceremonies are ideal for holidays. For the best ambiance this is wedding is the most effective in a dark church in the evening. Candles decorate the church, but also the attendants all carry candles during the wedding march. Make sure that you get your churches permission and check to see if you need any additional insurance ahead of time. Have fun with it and use your imagination.
If you’ve always loved the idea of a wedding with the sun shining, birds chirping and the smell of flowers then, you could think about a outdoor or garden wedding. They range from very formal to informal and are all about your “personal touches.” You can choose from a local park, a beach, forests or even the stream that you played in as a child. One romantic idea is to ride up on a horse. With the right dress, it gives a nice affect. Ask you florist about creative ways to decorate. Try to pick a season that’s comfortable. You don’t want it to be too hot or too cold, not only for you guests, but also because it can hinder decorations and the food for the dinner, etc. Something that some brides don’t think about is rain. Always make sure that you have a back up in form of a tent or reception hall just in case the weather is not your best friend. Most outdoor weddings do not have a recession, the bride and groom simply embrace the guests after the ceremony.
The final type of wedding is the in-home wedding. This is a personal form of ceremony that your parents or close friend may offer to host for you. There are many choices for where and how your wedding can go, however try to pick an attractive and spacious spot. Some brides like to meet their fathers at the bottom of a flight of stairs, or you can just meet up with the groom in front of the pastor without a precession. Remember to keep space in mind when choosing how many attendants, music, receiving line and the formality of the ceremony. Also play off the house’s architecture. If you decorate too formal or not formal enough depending on the house, it can turn out tacky.
There are a lot of things to keep in mind when you are choosing your wedding style: budget, religion, time, personal preferences and many more. It’s okay to dream a little. Remember though, no matter how small, large, fancy, or casual you choose to be, have fun. It’s your day, make it that way. Don’t let the stress of planning your dream day drag you down.
